5 Ways to Support Kids After Natural Disasters

Being displaced after a natural disaster can cause kids to feel cut off from their social supports, routines, and sense of security. Enduring a natural disaster can make children feel depressed and anxious, or can cause them to experience PTSD symptoms up to four years after the event (Lai & La Greca, 2020). Staying in hotel rooms or with friends or family for weeks or months on end often creates undue stress for both parents and kids. By being intentional about connection, routines, positivity, and gratitude, parents can protect their kids from the potentially negative impacts of disaster, even when kids are not able to return home for a long time.

1. Quickly Develop Sweet Routines

While in “survival mode,” routines help people calm down and connect. Whether it’s eating fresh strawberries from the hotel breakfast every morning, walking to a playground every day after school, keeping up the kids’ bedtime routines, or still engaging in “Taco Tuesday” despite being in a new place, routines provide a sense of stability during tumultuous times.

Routines help kids build an array of positive developmental outcomes, including those related to cognition, academic skills, self-regulation, social-emotional health, mental health, and physical health (Selman & Dilworth-Bart, 2023). They also act as a protective factor when children experience extreme challenges (Selman & Dilworth-Bart, 2023). They provide structure for relationship bonding, such as cuddling, talking, or spending time together. Routines help children anticipate future events, which reduces their stress (Ivanova & Israel, 2006). Regular routines also help children regulate thoughts, emotions, and behavior (Rosanbalm & Murray, 2017).

• 1:1 time routine. Spending simple one-on-one time with children, such as going for a walk, playing a game, or getting hot chocolate together, offers an opportunity to have fun and be fully present. The more time parents spend with children, the higher their children's well-being tends to be (Li & Guo, 2023). When kids don’t feel emotionally supported, they are three times as likely to experience depression and anxiety (Zablotsky et al., 2024).
• Bedtime routine. Bedtime routines offer a perfect modality to consistently deliver nurturing care to at-risk children. Bedtime routines promote early language development, literacy, child emotional and behavioral regulation, parent-child attachment, and family functioning (Mindell & Williamson, 2017). A solid bedtime routine also helps children sleep better and longer and have fewer sleep problems (Mindell et al., 2015).
• Mealtime routine. When mealtimes have more structure and routine, parents and children appear to enjoy them much more, and children are less fussy about eating (Finnane et al., 2017; Powell et al., 2017). Consistent mealtime routines help kids feel secure.

2. Model Positivity, Happiness, and Hope

Research around social contagion theory suggests that emotions and outlooks are contagious. People’s attitudes, moods, and behaviors spread from one person to another in social networks, such as a family, in a matter of seconds (Fowler et al., 2008; Karashiali, 2023).

Kids pick up on and emulate their parents’ happiness and positivity, or they pick up on their stress. There is a significant association between children’s self-reported happiness and parents’ perceived happiness (Maftei et al., 2020). There is also a strong correlation between parent and child stress. For example, maternal anxiety significantly predicts child stress (as measured by cortisol secretion) (Williams et al., 2013).

Resiliency researcher Lucy Hone suggests that following a tragedy people remember that suffering is a part of every human’s existence and that we are not entitled to perfect lives (Hone, 2019). Following a challenge, Hone suggests “hunting for the good stuff” and “turning toward the positive” (Hone, 2019).

When parents model positive emotions, they give children a “psychological break or respite” from grief. These breaks provide replenishment when feeling depleted from experiencing a lot of sadness or anger (Workman, n.d.). Research suggests that happiness and a positive outlook protect against PTSD after a trauma (Bryan et al., 2020; Pimental & Silva de Oliveira, 2024). The happier a person is, the less likely they are to develop PTSD symptoms.

3. Increase Hugs and Comforting Touch

After a traumatic event or a disruption of usual activity, kids need more comforting and consoling touch. Hugs “downregulate stress systems” (Romney et al., 2023). One study found that when people got more hugs, their cortisol levels were lower upon awakening the next day (Romney et al., 2023). Another study found that participants recalled emotional memories that were paired with touch as less emotionally painful than those that were not paired with touch (Sahi et al., 2021). While touch does not decrease the immediate experience of pain, it may support the adaptive processing of emotional experiences over time (Sahi et al., 2021).

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In addition to cuddling children more, it may be helpful to teach children self-soothing touch, such as placing a hand over their heart or wrapping their arms around themselves, both of which can lower stress and cortisol levels (Dreisoerner et al., 2021).

4. Reconnect Children to Social & Emotional Support

After a disaster, reconnecting children to sources of social support (e.g., parents, teachers, peers, extended family, coaches, or mental health professionals) improves their mental health and well-being (Bakic & Ajdukovic, 2021; Lai et al., 2018). Bringing a child to school, gymnastics practice, or a counseling session when they are displaced from their home may seem trivial, but when people perceive they have more social support, they tend to feel happier, less depressed, and less stressed (Wilson et al., 2020).

5. Honor Grief, Express Gratitude, and Give Back

Give children space to "honor their grief" by crying or talking about what they've lost, without a rush.

Help children “count their blessings” by recounting “daily gratitudes” (saying what they are thankful for) at mealtime or bedtime, or by expressing gratitude to those who helped them (such as writing thank-you cards to firefighters or first responders). Gratitude has an array of benefits, including an increase in happiness (Emmons et al., 2019). When youth in one study “counted their blessings,” they reported more gratitude, optimism, life satisfaction, and decreased negative affect (Froh et al., 2008).

Help children help others. Research suggests that volunteering out of altruism after a natural disaster fosters a sense of community resilience and improved psychological well-being of survivors (Ganoe et al., 2023). Some examples of ways children can help give back are baking cookies for helpers, making meals for families, or hosting hygiene, toy, or backpack drives for impacted kids.

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