Your survival guide to mortifying moments.
Verified by Psychology Today
Helping couples thrive together or apart.
Joy A. Dryer Ph.D.
Asking for a “Thank You” can mean more than it seems. But defining what you really want may be hard to pinpoint.
A trial separation is a crucial unmasking time, revealing who you are, and what you want. It’s less scary to work together, even when living apart.
Replay a fight until you get it right. This bottom-up, in-your-body approach helps you experience both your and your partner’s other-side-of-the-mountain perspectives.
Partners are like kings and queens who need to make agreements under which they live and rule. They thrive when their realm is governed by fairness and sensitivity for all.
Relationships are never free of “issues.” We all continue to work on the basics to enjoy a secure functioning relationship, in or out of therapy.
He insists he’s not unfaithful like her father was. She insists she won’t be a victim like her mother was.
"I feel some hope that you understand how hurt I am. You’ve never really said ‘sorry’ before."
Personal Perspective: April Fools' Day history hints at how truth can be disguised. Multi-layered “truths” can shift perceptions.
A couple's “me–thee" perspective toward each other predicts a relationship’s likely demise.
Humans and dogs experience an increase in oxytocin when gazing into each other's eyes. This hormonal response helps bond mother and baby and romantic couples, too.
"He says he doesn't always feel happy with me. He has some ideal of perfection..."
You'll feel loved when you hear your partner with your eyes, and stay in the moment.
Joy A. Dryer, Ph.D., is a psychologist/psychoanalyst and divorce mediator in private practice in New York City and a former adjunct associate professor of psychology at New York University.