This Isn't What I Expected

Notes on healing postpartum depression

Karen Kleiman MSW, LCSW

Healthcare Providers and Your Perinatal Population

Every healthcare provider who comes in contact with a perinatal woman should hand her a list of reputable, reliable, and accessible local maternal mental health professionals.

Healthcare Providers Continue to Miss the Mark

They should no longer be shocked when a postpartum woman discloses she is having scary thoughts.

#SpeaktheSecret

Postpartum women do not talk about how they are really feeling.

Having a Baby After Postpartum Depression?

Do not tell me to snap out of it. I can’t.

The Contamination of Motherhood?

Depending on one’s frame of reference, mothers could, conceivably, be taking on way too much responsibility for things that may be largely out of their control.

"I Had No Idea I Was Overdoing It"

If you think you might be overdoing it, you probably are.

The Voice of Depression

If we consider depression as a voice that serves to protect the core self, it may be the only way her system can respond when she’s overwhelmed.

Is Authentic Suffering the Missing Link?

Authentic suffering is that which is obscured by what she wants us to know and what she will let us see.

Sitting with Suffering

Mastering our environment is something that can feel impossible when the odds of anything getting better are slim.

Suicide Is a Scary Word

Passive thoughts of suicide should alert every therapist to the possibility that darkness is looming.

Postpartum Depression: Mothers and Babies Are Still Dying

Scores of pregnant and postpartum women continue to suffer in silence and wonder if letting someone know will make things better or worse.

The 5 Promises Every Couple Should Make to Each Other

I will refrain from asking or wondering what I will get out of this.

Countertransference: When is Yours Mine?

Our job is to let her know that no matter how bad she feels, how hard she cries and how much it hurts, it’s okay.

Are You Ready to Give?

Rule number one that I learned early on in my marriage: Never presume.

Do Not Stop Until You Find the Right Help

Accept the fact that you are not feeling good right now and that it will not always feel this way. Ask for help.

Holding Perinatal Women in Distress

You do this as she leans away from you, tempted by the darkness.

C'mon, Do Postpartum Women Really Need Therapy?

Connecting with a therapist who knows what is going on with you right now provides clarification and essential reassurance

Perfectly Postpartum

Kindness toward yourself can help offset the pangs of self-criticism.

Naked

This state of feeling raw and exposed is precisely what propels some postpartum women into therapy and what deters others from ever seeking help.

9 Ways Motherhood Can Break Your Spirit

Longing for previous, worry-free days where spontaneity and carefree enjoyment was plentiful feels utterly incompatible with how your life feels right now.

How Am I Doing?

Most women never completely outgrow the need for approval from their mothers.

White Spots

Anxiety has no regard for where you are at the moment your bodily functions kick into high gear.

4 Reasons You Might Want to LOVE Your Anxiety.

What if you could reframe that anxiety and actually learn to believe that it is one of the best parts of who you are?

A Pledge to My Postpartum Self

I will not surrender to the pressure from others or from myself to pretend I am okay if I am worried about the way I am feeling or thinking.

7 Steps Toward Resiliency

There is nothing remarkable about motherhood and anxiety other than to say that it is expected and rather unexceptional.

Are You Experiencing Early Ambivalence in Your Marriage?

Ambivalence can take the form of apathy but in actuality it is concealing the hurt and vulnerability.

Doctors, Are You Listening?

Women with postpartum depression and anxiety lose access to care and treatment when their front line medical team fails to comprehend the nature of their illness.

Let's Face it: Sometimes Being a Mother Doesn't Feel Good

What does a mother do with the burden of ambivalence she feels toward the baby she has longed for?

5 Things New Mothers Can Do To Feel Better

No one is in a better position to assess how you are doing than you are.

The Downside to Trying to Be Happy

Postpartum women in distress need to lower their expectations.

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