Intimacy, A Path Toward Spirituality

Relationships and mindful living.

John Amodeo Ph.D., MFT

How to Heal Our Loneliness

The fear of taking risks, the fear of feeling shame and embarrassment, and the fear of being vulnerable can keep us isolated. Here's how to move forward.

Why It's OK to Seek Reassurance

Needing reassurance is part of being human; no one is totally self-sufficient. Find the strength to be vulnerable and share your fears and insecurities.

Finding Spiritual Depth in Our Relationships

Authentic spirituality is not separate from our emotional life. Meditation is not enough. We need to engage skillfully with our emotions in order to develop healthy relationships.

Would You Like to Become More Interesting?

We may shy away from people because we think we're not interesting. What is the key to being interesting? How can we cultivate alive connections and live a more interesting life?

Are You Suffering From News Exposure Stress Syndrome?

How do we find a balance between staying informed and not feeling overwhelmed or debilitated by overexposure to troubling news stories?

Are You Wondering Why You're Lonely?

Loneliness is rampant in our society. We may be contributing to our own loneliness by certain habits that might seem so natural that you're not even aware of them.

Is Your Self-Expression Damaging Your Relationships?

Does your manner of self-expression damage trust in your relationships? How can we find a balance so that we can be emotionally honest while preserving safe connections?

The Surprising Power of a Smile

What keeps us from smiling more? Offering a generous smile can be contagious and may help improve the quality of our day.

Is Unconditional Love Really Possible?

Many people pursue the ideal of unconditional love. But is this possible or a setup for disappointment? How can we be responsive to others while also being responsive to ourselves?

Practical Tips for Metabolizing a Compliment

We often deflect people's compliments, because we're been taught to be self-effacing. But letting ourselves receive and metabolize a compliment can nurture us as nothing else can.

Are You Codependent or Just a Caring Person?

It helps to be aware of our tendency to neglect our own needs, but we may be too quick to label ourselves as "codependent."

Things We Say That Block Contact

Our common responses to someone's kind words or action can invite deeper contact or push people away. Being more mindful of our language may open a door to deeper connections.

Two Essential Ingredients for Effective Communication

We may think we have a communication problem, and perhaps we do. But more fundamentally, we often have difficulty practicing these two things, which can help us break through.

Tuning Up Your Listening

We want to be heard, but how skilled are we at listening openly to others? Tuning up our listening skills can deepen connection and intimacy in our important relationships.

The Toxic Emotion That Rules Our World

Shame is a hidden emotion that infects our politics. A sign of shame is to shame others. Spotting how shame operates can lead to wiser choices in our lives and in how we vote.

One View of Relationships That Needs a Proper Burial

The belief that no one can make us feel anything is an unrealistic belief that can increase isolation and suffering. Personal growth means engaging with how we affect each other.

Meditation Can Improve Your Relationships

Cultivating inner quiet through meditation allows us to contact our truer, deeper feelings. Expressing these more subtle, nuanced feelings creates a climate for intimacy to grow.

The Feelings That Underlie Our Criticisms

The tendency to be critical is very human, yet it often has destructive effects in our relationships. Uncovering our truer, more vulnerable feelings is a powerful way to connect.

The Best Way to Apologize

Being human, it is unavoidable to hurt people sometimes. Yet it’s not always easy to recognize this an offer a genuine apology to repair the damage when we’ve injured or offended.

What Does Intimacy Have to Do with Spirituality?

Being human means having a soulful longing for intimacy. This article discusses how this impulse comes from the same place as our desire to live a spiritual life.

What Does Mindfulness Have to Do With Intimacy?

Mindfulness can help our relationships by connecting us with what lives most deeply within ourselves.

If You’re Feeling Stuck, This May Be Why

Many of us are quietly plagued by a nagging sense being flawed or defective. We secretly believe that we’re a failure, which stifles our energy and prevents us from being free.

An Inauthentic Apology Can Be Maddening

Why is apologizing as difficult as a root canal for some people? This is how we may respond when we're protecting our image rather than sincerely apologizing.

Do You Feel Guilty or Ashamed?

This article helps us find a language to differentiate between how we feel when we make a mistake or fall short of our ideals from the paralyzing shame of being a mistake.

Re-Envisioning Commitment

Many of us seek commitment in order to create safe, lasting relationships. But a deeper inquiry might suggest that we need to fine-tune what we're actually committing ourselves to.

The Power of Healthy Shame

While toxic shame is destructive, healthy, friendly shame can offer a path toward seeing more clearly how we are affecting others. Friendly shame can get our attention.

Are You Addicted to Perfection?

We want to excel in our lives, but how can we differentiate the pursuit of excellence from a shame-driven desire for perfectionism?

Can Shame Be Your Friend?

Shame is often destructive and toxic. But can shame have a healthy aspect? This article explores how a light, friendly sense of shame can serve our lives and relationships.

Why We Like Being Appreciated

We all likening appreciated, but what is it about receiving gratitude that touches us? This article explores five things about gratitude that warms our heart and lifts our spirits.

Have You Been Falsely Accused?

Being falsely accused is a painful emotional experience. The pain and shame of not being seen as we really are creates deep heartache and frustration. How can we deal with this?

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