Better Sex for You and Me
How to use your mouth to give more pleasure to both of you.
Posted Mar 29, 2018
My last cartoon was about how an introvert can rock any party. It's pretty easy, if you use the tricks there.
And from introverts we jump to intimacy. Good sex often brings up that age old question...what if his sexual fantasies or desires aren't something you're wild about doing, including oral sex? Springer suggests it's part of the sexual script, both before and after marriage.
Evolutionary Psychology asks the question, Is cunnilingus-assisted orgasm a male mate-retention Strategy? It suggests that men perform this to keep their lady satisfied and committed. But does it work for fellatio, too? And what about ejaculation? In or out of the mouth?
There may be a scientific practical reason to swallow. According to a study in the Journal of Reproductive Immunology, swallowing semen can make your body accustomed to someone's DNA so that your immune system doesn't act up during pregnancy.
But let's stick to the pleasure of oral sex. I'm rewatching Sex and the City for the umpteenth time, and this situation comes up frequently. Sure, Samantha is up for everything, but the other 3 definitely have their preferences, and prejudices. Not every woman wants to swallow, and that's her right.
Cosmopolitan has some candid sex advice.. They call fellatio "deep throating,", and say guys don't really care how women do it, or even if they just sort of half-way do it. (Meaning, don't swallow all of it.) In the heat of the moment, it jumps judgement.
Michael Castleman, another contributor here in Psychology Today, says the sticking point for women is whether they would rather spit or swallow. There's a lot of concern about "doing it right."
He writes, Don't worry.
...it’s not at all like a gunshot but more like biting down on a warm cherry tomato.
So please don't leave fellatio out of your bag of tricks. No matter which way you choose to perform it, you'll be doing a good deed for someone special. And maybe you'll get a return favor.
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