Why “Never Mix Business with Friendship” Is a Cop-out

The old adage, “Never mix business with friendship,” doesn’t really hold water. When we examine this notion closely, we find that it’s based more on misconception than on any real danger. You see, choosing to give business to a stranger over a friend simply signals a person failing to comprehend what true friendship and mutual support looks like.

This has happened to me many times over the years. I've reached out to friends who were in the position to lend and hand and they simply made excuses. It is so disappointing.

Yet, when friends have reached out to me looking for business, I go out of my way to accommodate them. I’ve even diverted good-paying work that I had lined up for myself to friends, just because they asked. I could have been selfish and kept it all for myself. I could have even used the excuse that "I never mix business with friendship," but I didn't.

Why? Don't you think that not giving some business to a friend who is highly qualified and possesses the experience to deliver outstanding results is just a bit hypocritcal? I do.

In fact, I believe any excuse not to lend my support to someone I consider a friend is just a cop-out.

The Cop-Out Mentality

One of the primary reasons people avoid doing business with friends is fear—fear that the transaction will become awkward, that expectations will be unclear, or that conflict will arise. But instead of addressing these concerns head-on, many default to that old saying as a way to sidestep the issue entirely. This avoidance isn’t about business integrity; it’s about personal discomfort.

Additionally, failing to do business with friends often implies a lack of confidence on the part of the "buyer."

If you truly believe in your friend’s abilities, why wouldn’t you support their business? And if their work is subpar, wouldn’t honest feedback help them improve? The unwillingness to engage suggests either an unwillingness to offer that support or a lack of confidence in your ability to have the necessary conversations.

Of course, avoiding business with friends can be a sign of detachment, too. It’s easier to deal with a stranger because there’s no personal stake in the outcome.

But this logic is flawed. Business is, at its core, built on relationships. If we’re willing to support faceless corporations, why not support the people closest to us?

Trust, Reciprocity, and the Strength of Relationships

The truth is, doing business with friends is not only safe; it’s one of the best ways to strengthen relationships. A friend in business is likely to provide better service because they have a personal stake in your satisfaction. There’s a level of trust and mutual care that doesn’t exist with strangers.

Additionally, supporting a friend’s business fosters goodwill. If we actively invest in our friends’ success, they go that extra yard for us. This strengthens community bonds, builds mutual success, and reinforces the very principles of loyalty and support that true friendship is built upon.

Plus, It's Good for Us!

Doing business with friends can be emotionally fulfilling for several reasons:

1. Trust and Reliability. You already have a foundation of trust, which reduces stress and uncertainty in business dealings.
2. Emotional Support. Friends can provide encouragement during challenges, making the ups and downs of business feel less isolating.
3. Shared Values and Vision. Working with someone who aligns with your values can make business decisions more harmonious and meaningful.
4. Open Communication. Honest conversations come more naturally, leading to better problem-solving and collaboration.
5. Increased Enjoyment. When you genuinely enjoy the company of your business partner, work feels less like a grind and more like a shared adventure.

Friends Essential Reads

When Friends Miss the Mark: Social Support and Friendship

Friendships: A Profound Part of Life, But Sometimes Not All Roses

That said, it's important to set clear boundaries and expectations to prevent conflicts from harming the friendship.

Indeed, success all comes down to mindset.

Embracing the Right Mindset

Rather than using outdated adages as an excuse, we should challenge ourselves to think differently about business and friendship. Here's how:

• Instead of fearing conflict, we should focus on clear communication.
• Instead of avoiding emotional investment, we should recognize the value of supporting those we care about.
• Instead of defaulting to strangers, we should take pride in contributing to the success of people in our own circles.

Business and friendship aren’t mutually exclusive. In fact, the most successful partnerships are often built on strong relationships.

It’s time to retire the old excuse and start seeing business with friends for what it really is: a chance to support, uplift, and win together.