Many older people worry that they're becoming irrelevant. That's especially true for people who have been a respected expert or leader.
How does one deal with the reality that even most eminent people slowly become less and less relevant, replaced by young 'uns?
First, you may be able to slow your irrelevance by trying to stay current in your field or even take on a new specialty. My wife, Barbara Nemko is well into middle age and just a few years ago decided to be an innovator in education technology, something she had no experience with. No, she didn't learn programming but she learned what works best and tried things out in her county's schools. Then she used her public speaking skill to talk about her experiences with these innovations (e.g., using iPads with at-risk preschoolers to prepare them to love reading.) She has quickly become a leading figure in ed tech, having already received national awards.
A less daunting way to forestall irrelevance is to exert your influence a tier or three down. For example, you might mentor young people in your field,.Or provide some wisdom and a good ear to friends and family members. After all, Erik Erikson said that after 60, we're in the transgenerativity stage: passing on what we've learned to the next generation, without thinking we have all the answers---Our input is only one ingredient in a person's gumbo of learning.
Even if you try to stay current and seek new adventures, it's usually necessary to eventually make peace with your growing irrelevance. After all, it is true that at a certain point, energy, memory, and physical health decline. And alas, it's a one-way conveyer belt. So in the end, while we may opt to, as Dylan Thomas urged, "rage, rage against the dying light," we're probably wise to aim for at least a measure of acceptance.
Some people may find it easier to accept their increasing irrelevance by talking with other people who feel irrelevant. Should you, for example, start a group of respected colleagues and friends? Call it Shades of Gray?
My own approach to irrelevance is to keep trying to be as relevant as possible--by doing what I believe are my most helpful kinds of work but letting go of the outcome, not caring whether I'm viewed as irrelevant. If someone thinks I am, maybe, to them, I am. And if they're wrong, it's their loss. I just try to stay in the moment and do the work I believe is most valuable. The outcome is beyond my control.
Marty Nemko's bio is in Wikipedia.
