How of Happiness

The scientific pursuit of happiness

Friends
My Quibble With Facebook

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on May 11, 2012

The reason I rarely take any pleasure in Facebook is that it "ordinizes" our friends, family members, acquaintances, and colleagues. It takes unique individuals who have intriguing hidden sides and qualities and turns them into ordinary, unremarkable, and sometimes even boring people.

The reason I rarely take any pleasure in Facebook is that it "ordinizes" our friends, family members, acquaintances, and colleagues. It takes unique individuals who have intriguing hidden sides and qualities and turns them into ordinary, unremarkable, and sometimes even boring people.

Marriage
Does Marriage Make Us Happy? Should It?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on February 19, 2012

The evidence is unequivocal that being married is correlated with happiness. The evidence is also unequivocal that the causal direction goes both ways. That is, having a strong marriage may make us happy, but those of us who are happy to begin with appear to be more likely to attract a marriage partner and to erect an enduring and fulfilling partnership.

The evidence is unequivocal that being married is correlated with happiness. The evidence is also unequivocal that the causal direction goes both ways. That is, having a strong marriage may make us happy, but those of us who are happy to begin with appear to be more likely to attract a marriage partner and to erect an enduring and fulfilling partnership.

Cognition
How Blinded Is Your Thinking at This Very Moment?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on November 11, 2011

Isn't it amazing how some days we wake up and the world seems beautiful—full of wonder, kindness, heroism, and brilliance? But other days, we wake to a conviction that the world is miserly and ugly, that the people around us are malevolent and small-minded, that the mole on our shoulder is cancerous, that our past is wasted, and our future is bleak.

Isn't it amazing how some days we wake up and the world seems beautiful—full of wonder, kindness, heroism, and brilliance? But other days, we wake to a conviction that the world is miserly and ugly, that the people around us are malevolent and small-minded, that the mole on our shoulder is cancerous, that our past is wasted, and our future is bleak.

Happiness
Are Some of Us Too Nice to Our Partners?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on February 26, 2011

In Poor Richard's Almanack, the incomparable Ben Franklin wrote, "Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards." He was right, but only to a point.

In Poor Richard's Almanack, the incomparable Ben Franklin wrote, "Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards." He was right, but only to a point.

Altruism
Does the “Pay It Forward” Effect Really Exist?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on November 29, 2010

Does the "pay it forward" effect really exist? How does generosity inspire others? Is giving really better than receiving? We're going to find out. 

Does the "pay it forward" effect really exist? How does generosity inspire others? Is giving really better than receiving? We're going to find out. 

Happiness
Can Money Buy Happiness or Steal From It?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on August 31, 2010

in my mind, one of the biggest misconceptions about money is that it can't make us happy - or rather, that the joys it offers can be only faint and fleeting. As it happens, a growing social science of money is showing how we can compensate for some of its damaging effects by getting the most out of our spending. The conclusion is that if we want to buy happiness, we need to wring as many rewarding and stretching experiences from our purchases as possible.

in my mind, one of the biggest misconceptions about money is that it can't make us happy - or rather, that the joys it offers can be only faint and fleeting. As it happens, a growing social science of money is showing how we can compensate for some of its damaging effects by getting the most out of our spending. The conclusion is that if we want to buy happiness, we need to wring as many rewarding and stretching experiences from our purchases as possible.

Happiness
Why Don’t Kids Make Us Happy?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on June 10, 2010

Why does having kids reduce our happiness? When posed on his late-night eponymous show, Stephen Colbert deemed the answer obvious: "Because children are a pain in the ass."Undoubtedly they are, but I think the question is worth exploring further.  

Why does having kids reduce our happiness? When posed on his late-night eponymous show, Stephen Colbert deemed the answer obvious: "Because children are a pain in the ass."Undoubtedly they are, but I think the question is worth exploring further.  

Happiness
How Quickly We Adapt: The Case of Obama

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on May 7, 2010

Do you remember what the 2008 presidential election felt like?  Do you remember the moment you realized that an African-American candidate, peddling hope and change, had a bona fide shot at winning the White House? Notwithstanding your party affiliation - was that not electrifying?How quickly we forget.

Do you remember what the 2008 presidential election felt like?  Do you remember the moment you realized that an African-American candidate, peddling hope and change, had a bona fide shot at winning the White House? Notwithstanding your party affiliation - was that not electrifying?How quickly we forget.

Happiness
What If You'd Never Met?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on September 3, 2009

I met my husband, Peter, rather randomly, at all-the-Absolut-you-could-drink benefit for the Museum of Contemporary Art. Had we not met that night, we probably never would have ever chanced upon each other. Had one of us ventured several footsteps to the right or the left that evening, my husband, my children and my home might be subtracted from the life I lead today.

I met my husband, Peter, rather randomly, at all-the-Absolut-you-could-drink benefit for the Museum of Contemporary Art. Had we not met that night, we probably never would have ever chanced upon each other. Had one of us ventured several footsteps to the right or the left that evening, my husband, my children and my home might be subtracted from the life I lead today.

Media
Is There Anything To Be Happy About In Today's News?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on May 24, 2009

Is there anything to be happy about in today’s news?  As a scientist and an Obama supporter, these days I sometimes don’t know whether to laugh or cry.  Every other news headline appears to send a contradictory message.  One warns of the economy in free fall, sending jitters, another about the Obama administration recommitting to serious science or eradicating some nasty piece of legislation loitering from the last 8 years, prompting cheers.

Is there anything to be happy about in today’s news?  As a scientist and an Obama supporter, these days I sometimes don’t know whether to laugh or cry.  Every other news headline appears to send a contradictory message.  One warns of the economy in free fall, sending jitters, another about the Obama administration recommitting to serious science or eradicating some nasty piece of legislation loitering from the last 8 years, prompting cheers.

Happiness
When Everyone Loses

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on December 29, 2008

The New York Times published an op-ed piece of mine titled "Why We're Still Happy" (Dec 27, 2008). Because it was cut substantially, I thought I'd post the original here.

The New York Times published an op-ed piece of mine titled "Why We're Still Happy" (Dec 27, 2008). Because it was cut substantially, I thought I'd post the original here.

Trauma
How To Remain Happy When the Financial World Crumbles

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on September 19, 2008

Sometimes I think our country has gone nuts. We have collapsing financial markets, unprecedented housing foreclosures, $4 gas, and an emperor without any clothes on perambulating in the midst of an incredibly critical presidential election. But despite everything, many people (myself included) have a remarkable capacity to maintain optimism and confidence and even some cheer – about ourselves and the world around us.

Sometimes I think our country has gone nuts. We have collapsing financial markets, unprecedented housing foreclosures, $4 gas, and an emperor without any clothes on perambulating in the midst of an incredibly critical presidential election. But despite everything, many people (myself included) have a remarkable capacity to maintain optimism and confidence and even some cheer – about ourselves and the world around us.

Depression
Can Anything in Life Ever Surpass Winning 14 Gold Medals?

Sonja Lyubomirsky Ph.D. on August 20, 2008

As I was watching Michael Phelps receive his 14th gold medal—what a week!—this is what I was thinking: “How could anything in this 23-year old swimmer’s life ever top this?” And: “After he comes down from the high, will he ultimately end up less happy than the rest of us mere mortals?”

As I was watching Michael Phelps receive his 14th gold medal—what a week!—this is what I was thinking: “How could anything in this 23-year old swimmer’s life ever top this?” And: “After he comes down from the high, will he ultimately end up less happy than the rest of us mere mortals?”

Back
Back
Find a Therapist
Back
Get Help
Back
Magazine
November 2025 magazine cover
November 2025
Healing Family Splits

Cut-offs cut deep and wide, their emotional impact reverberating far beyond the combatants. Because much of the suffering is hidden, repair is challenging for everyone, not least of all therapists.

Subscribe Issue Archive
Back
Tests
Self Tests
Self Tests

Self Tests are all about you. Are you outgoing or introverted? Are you a narcissist? Does perfectionism hold you back? Find out the answers to these questions and more with Psychology Today.

Self Assessments
Quizzes