Dr. Matt James

Focus on Forgiveness

Got Empowerment?

Just saying that you’re empowered doesn’t actually mean that you are.

Posted May 30, 2018

Anna Om/Shutterstock
Source: Anna Om/Shutterstock

Using the problems you are facing as a path to spiritual growth or forgiveness, without solving the issue or problem, doesn’t lead to mental and emotional release. And, saying that things happen for a reason and that you should be grateful for the lessons that you are being taught, while not looking at why they happen in the first place, does not lead to personal growth. 

Just saying you’re empowered, doesn’t actually mean that you are. Just saying that you are grateful for the path, doesn’t solve the issue you are facing. And, just saying everything is meant to happen doesn’t mean that what happened is right. 

Unfortunately, some people who study beautiful spiritual paths and amazing personal growth concepts, use those same concepts and ideas to avoid dealing with their own issues. Or, to put it another way, they use these teachings to skip working on their deeper issues.

I know that sounds counter-intuitive because if you study these things, you must be more empowered, right? Not necessarily, there is a way to know if you are truly empowered or spiritual. So, I challenge you now to ask yourself, "Do your actions reflect your teachings? Do your actions produce the results that your personal growth concepts focus on?" If they don’t, you may be suffering from something that many suffer from. That is, believing you are empowered because you can think and speak the language of empowerment. 

If you truly want to be empowered, this is a very important thing to encounter in your path. Something that anyone who dares to travel this path will someday have to face. You are not alone, and if you are failing to produce the results of empowerment, this may be an important article for you.

Let us start simply. 

Everyone has heard the concept "action is more powerful than words," and yet more and more people have learned only how to speak the language of personal growth and spirituality. For example, a student recently shared with me that, while they are miserable with their relationship and job, while they are “addicted” to food and alcohol, and even though they see very little hope of overcoming these issues, they know it is “a part of the path,” and that it is all “meant to be.”

I responded by saying, “Yes, it is true that a part of one’s path could be to go through difficult times. It is fair to say, that the difficult times in my life helped me to be who I am today, and I wouldn’t trade them in for anything, and therefore, they were meant to be.” And, then I asked her how long it had been going on.

“About 20 years,” she said.

Ok, so for 20 years, this person has avoided taking action by repeating the mantra that ‘all is meant to be as it is’ and ‘it is just a part of the path.’ However, from my spiritual teachings, if one is suffering, that is a clue. A clue that things are bad and that some action needs to be taken.

Again, we all believe the actions speak louder than words. So, you need to take an honest look and ask yourself, “Do your actions reflect your words and your thoughts?” More importantly, do your actions demonstrate your teachings, even when no one else is around?

Action is not “lip service.” Action equals results. The simplest way to say it is; how you measure if you are empowered is by looking at your results versus your words. Meaning, if you have more "reasons" why you are not being who you are meant to be, doing what you really want to do, or having the things you deserve, then you are not yet truly empowered. You may think you are, but you are not.

A previous post I wrote focused on starting with the mind and beliefs; that you have to believe something in order for things to come into manifestation. And, I do still believe that!

To get that belief to become reality you must take action! To help you to take action, I am giving you free access to a special report called ‘Everything you need to know to achieve your goals.’

Are you happy? Really ponder that question. 

In life, I have found, young or old, man or woman, in any area of life, it seems to boil down to happiness. People just want to be happy with, their family, relationships, career, and health. They want to feel fulfilled and loved. Yet, many that I meet at our events do not yet feel this. Those same people have taken dozens of trainings and seminars in personal growth and read many self-help books. Was there something wrong with the other classes or books? 

Every diet works, the problem is that people fail to work on the diet. Well, the same is true for personal growth and spirituality. Every path has merits and benefits, and every path has individuals who do not tap into them with their actions. 

What can you do to tap into your teachings, and really begin to experience happiness? 

First, start with the difficult task of facing your results, and asking the questions above. Look at your actions, especially the ones that happen when no one is looking. You are not able to solve the deeper issue until you face that there is one. As long as you remain at the spiritual bypass, you cannot deal with the issue.

Second, pinpoint how and what you really feel about what is occurring, and identify the pattern you are running. For example, one of my clients told me that an employee had stolen from him, and now there was going to be a lawsuit, but that it was ok, because it was all meant to be, and he could practice forgiveness. I teach forgiveness. I said to him, “Is that how you really feel?” He said, “NO! I need to fire him, and get my team back on board!” In saying that, he identified the action steps to take to handle the situation; and what you do next. Find the deeper issue, and the pattern, so you know which tool will help you solve the problem. 

Finally, find the right tools and resources to solve the deeper issue. If it is emotional baggage, get my new book Mental and Emotional Release®. If it is forgiveness, I have a book on Ho`oponopono. If it is a mindset, books like The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson, or Peak by Anders Ericsson are amazing at shifting the mindset of a daily practice. There are hundreds of amazing tools out there that can help you match up the problem with a solution, start simply with a Google search. 

Overall, being able to face your deeper issues brings you closer to the happiness you truly deserve. 

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