10 Ways to Get Along Better With the People You Already Love
7. If your partner is in a bad mood, don't just leave them there.
Posted October 13, 2016
In our everyday interactions, we all hit what I call relationship speed bumps, which make us slow down and may jostle us a bit but also provide an opportunity to learn a little more about life and love. That being said, it is best to avoid these bumps whenever possible, and here are 10 tips for doing just that:
- Don’t try to always get your way.
It has been said that if you give in on the little things, you will get the big ones. Sometimes people have to feel they are right, and it may be wiser to let them have that than to try to force them to see it your way. If it’s no big deal, just let it go.
- Lend a hand.
It’s hard to be cordial when you're stressed, and your loved one may not be able to hide feeling overwhelmed. If someone close to you is overwhelmed, offer a little assistance.
- Learn to compromise.
They should insert the word “compromise” into our marriage vows, because being willing and able to do that is important for getting along and staying connected.
- Commit a random act of kindness.
It doesn’t have to be a big gesture, as long as it's heartfelt. Think of it as depositing love in your emotional bank account. The kinder you are, the more kindness you will receive. Your loved ones may not be as receptive at the start as you might like, but once they feel it, they will usually reciprocate.
- Don’t yell.
A couple of decades ago, I got into an argument and yelled so loud that I rattled the dual-pane windows. That was a strong sign to me that I was way over the top, and I had to make a behavior correction. I haven’t yelled since.
- Once you recognize a flaw, fix it.
As in the previous example, when you see something isn’t right, do what you can to correct it. If you need help, get it, but don’t let unhealed wounds and issues fester or grind down your relationships.
- If a loved one is feeling down, do what you can to cheer him or her up.
It seems simple enough, but most people just let those around them stay in an uncomfortable mood when all it may take to get a loved one out of it is a quick conversation or maybe a hug. Misery does not love company. Lift the spirits of those you love, and your life will be better for it.
- Go with the flow.
You may have had plans to go out to dinner or a movie, and if your partner wants to stay in, you may be disappointed, but this is a good time to be generous and agree to just hang out instead. There will be many other times you can go out.
- Avoid getting upset when someone, say, takes your parking place.
If you live with other people, as most of us do, there will be times when you feel that your boundaries are being crossed. When that happens, just say something like, “You know, this time it’s fine, but in the future, could you please park somewhere else?” Asking in this way will keep tension from building, and the other person will be more likely to respect your request.
- Say “I love you” more often.
No matter what happens, if you keep the love flowing, things will get better. When we are feeling a little off, hearing “I love you” can make the difference between a good day and a bad one.