8 Things That Can Hold You Back AND Make You Stronger

Successful people make mistakes, AND learn from them.

Posted Sep 23, 2013

We can all be overly self-critical, especially when we realize that our behavior could have been better than it was, but luckily we can learn from our mistakes and we can do better the next time around. Here’s how. 

  • Don’t be inhibited by your past choices. You did what you did; it’s in your past and you can’t change it. What you can do now is to start making things as good as they can be from here on out. 
  • Nurture the trust in your relationships. Living with the strength of spirit you get from really knowing that someone you love and trust has your back is one of the most wonderful parts of being connected to another person. In fact, it is one of the great reasons for being in a relationship. Don’t disrespect the trust that is given to you, but honor it. On that note, know when to stand up for yourself if someone in your life is being untrustworthy.
  • When you apologize, show that you mean it deeply. To truly forgive you, whoever it is that you hurt needs to be able to know that you feel his or her pain. Once you understand this, and if you repeat back what you heard someone say, the person you hurt will feel that you are making the heartfelt apology that is needed to create closure and help you both move on.
  • Don’t beat yourself up for being complacent. Maybe you needed to be low-key or accepting at that particular time. When you go with the flow, it can take you places that, in your rearview mirror, don’t make you look and feel as good as you would like. But it is better to walk around a potential tar pit than through it.
  • You can’t really enjoy life unless you’re being nice. There are a few folks out there who get off by making others suffer, but for those of us who are emotionally fit, if you’re treating your partner in a shabby manner, you aren’t going to feel as good about yourself as you would if you were being a nice guy or gal.
  • Anger can kill motivation. It makes you not want to try. Avoid getting stuck in fruitless attempts at retaliation when you get mad at someone. Better to let go of anger than to waste time and energy doing something snarky to hurt the person who ticked you off. Instead, focus your energy and creativity on positive behaviors. Only good can come from it.
  • Don’t give up on yourself. There will always be slackers, and there will be others who are wildly more successful than you’ve ever dreamed of being. You have your own special blend of secret sauce, and once you perfect the recipe, the world will be begging for more. Comparing yourself to others just confuses what really matters.

Whenever anyone asks me how I became successful, I always give the same answer: I’ve made a lot of mistakes, and I’ve learned from them. So can you.

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