Navigating Misophonia With People Who Haven’t Heard of It

What if you’re advocating for yourself, and the other person lies about making the sound? For some reason, this was not on my radar of things that would happen. And yet, over the holidays, I had asked a relative to stop making a noise, and they said, “Oh, I wouldn’t make that noise!” only to go on and repeat the action an hour later.

While I am not sure they knew this was happening, it was a very loud, very abrupt sound—not a subtle sound. Perhaps my relative was unaware that this was what I was specifically referring to. I do not want to assume she was lying about the trigger sound, but I was left frustrated nonetheless. This has made me consider accommodations and communicating for misophonia from yet another angle.

It’s not uncommon for individuals with misophonia to feel hesitant or uneasy about using accommodations or assistive tools to manage their condition. These feelings of guilt or shame can stem from various sources, such as being told in childhood that their misophonia was “their problem” and that they should simply “get over it.” This messaging can lead to internalized stigma and a reluctance to use devices like earplugs, noise generators, sensory tools, or headphones (Brout et al., 2018).

Additionally, some people worry about how others might perceive them while using these tools, fearing judgment or misunderstanding. This concern for social acceptance is deeply rooted in human nature; after all, being part of a group historically provided safety, and standing out as different could feel threatening on a primal level (Edelstein et al., 2013).

Despite these challenges, it is crucial for those with misophonia to feel empowered to use the tools and accommodations that help them manage their condition. Just as society supports individuals who use hearing aids for hearing loss or wheelchairs for mobility challenges, we should extend the same understanding and acceptance toward those managing sensory or neurological conditions like misophonia (Jastreboff & Jastreboff, 2014). While public awareness of misophonia may still be limited, it’s important for individuals with the condition to show themselves the same kindness and grace they would offer a loved one or a stranger managing a more widely recognized disability.

Misophonia is a lifelong condition, and learning to navigate it effectively is a journey, not a quick fix. The accommodations and tools available are essential for managing the challenges of misophonia, and they should be used without hesitation or shame. For those living with misophonia, as well as the clinicians supporting them, recognizing the value of accommodations and advocating for their use is a fundamental step in reducing the impact of this condition (Rouw & Erfanian, 2018).

Lastly, if someone you’re asking for accommodations from does not understand your request or fully grasp the trigger you’re describing, it may be helpful to provide a clear and compassionate explanation. Misophonia is still a relatively misunderstood condition, and advocacy often involves educating others about how specific triggers affect you and how the requested accommodations can help.