Confidence
Can You Self-Promote Too Much?
Know the risks and rewards of self-promotion.
Updated September 1, 2025 Reviewed by Jessica Schrader
Key points
- Not everyone self-promotes—there’s a reason why.
- Despite the optics, it can help as much as harm.
- Reconsider why you do it—or don’t—and consciously choose.
Do you regularly post proud news on social media or volunteer your skills for yet another workplace project? Some people self-promote unashamedly. Others don’t.
In reality, most people dislike advertising their greatness, but some tolerate it, valuing credit over cringe.
Which camp are you in? And does it matter?
Why We Self-Promote
Self-promotion isn’t just a professional decision; it’s a psychological gamble. Why do some want to be president of the local tennis club while others shun the spotlight? Why do some employees self-select for plum assignments while others duck?
Science says it starts with personality.
Self-promoters tend to be extroverts who enjoy the stage and project confidence. Some may even be narcissists who are shown to predict leadership, alongside emotional awareness and self-efficacy.
Context also matters. The extent to which someone is perceived as a leader dictates their probability of success. It can become self-fulfilling. I’ve seen this many times in industry. Someone labeled “hot to watch” in performance reviews lands a prompt promotion.
The internet has also normalized self-promotion. On X, TikTok, and LinkedIn, showing off to fit in can feel compulsory. Author Gary Vaynerchuk calls it basic "plumbing" for business.
Self-promoters use competition to justify their manufactured visibility. Why? Only a fraction of employees make it onto leadership tracks. All helps. But when advancement depends on social connection, existing hierarchies become entrenched. For instance, research indicates that Black employees who self-promote receive lower evaluations on organization fit and performance—despite identical abilities. No wonder minorities are less enthusiastic.
Women are also reticent. On social media, academic women are 28% less likely than men to promote their work, often subject to a gender-bias penalty. And only 60% of female employees were found to take steps toward self-promotion.
Nevertheless, the payoff is attractive. In a crowded world, differentiation increases brand power and the probability of sales growth, popularity, or going viral.
Given this incentive, why do some people choose not to self-promote?
Why Some Don’t Self-Promote
You might assume a non-promoter is a shy introvert, apathetic, or a crowd-follower. “No one else is posting achievements, so I won’t," they may say. Or they may believe the common delusion that “the boss knows all I’m doing so I don’t have to.”
But not every non-promoter is riddled with self-doubt and pessimism. Sometimes they’re just more self-assured, savvy, and measured than self-promoters. They may see it as sleazy and not crave the applause.
Cultural or social norms may exert undue pressure to showcase or hide strengths. These expectations are evident from childhood through the workplace and even at retirement. At times, we fall into a pattern of behavior without even thinking about it.
“Take every opportunity,” we often hear. We’re conditioned to think success is a senior title, the right car or neighborhood, and see this as a route forward. Companies actively reward this mindset to fuel productivity and performance.
It’s not true. Condoleezza Rice chose not to run for U.S. president, preferring a career in academia. Michelle Obama was widely touted to run yet chose not to. You can’t assume everyone wants what society suggests—or what you want.
At parties or in Starbucks, when you boast about your achievements, others may admire you. You’re doing what they’re uncomfortable doing. As we respect confidence, you gain kudos—but only for a while. Beware of social penalties.
How to Self-Promote Without Backlash
Everyone is now in the business of impression management. It’s how you do it that matters.
- Differentiate between praising "me" or "we." Others may feel overlooked if not credited. Distinguish personal from team success. Ask yourself, “If skeptical colleagues read this, would they feel respected?”
- Know the cost: Academy Award winner Olivia Colman advises that success cannot shield you from criticism: "I'm afraid I am very thin-skinned.” Actor Benedict Cumberbatch agrees that "you can't do it all without there being a cost ... you just have to weigh up what those balances are."
- Examine your rationale. What do you want from all this attention? Ask what it gives you—and what it takes from you. Ego can inflate or deflate quickly, crushing self-esteem. You may self-promote for immediate gratification, yet this can quickly turn to envy, especially if observers feel as capable as you.
- Monitor judgment. As peer liking influences the likelihood of leadership, avoid heavy-handed self-promotion. This can be misperceived as arrogance, destroying reputation. In my book TUNE IN: How to Make Smarter Decisions in a Noisy World, I reveal how the ego and identity traps sabotage judgment and careers.
- Beware the bias beast. Self-promoters tend to exhibit predictable biases. They may neglect the probability of failure or criticism. Optimists by nature, they think, “It’ll work out!” These success stories highlight classic survivorship bias where the eager entrepreneur overlooks the 95% that fail.
- Find advocates. When others advocate for you, it accelerates advancement, influence and visibility. For instance, Sheryl Sandberg openly credits mentors and sponsors who helped her rise faster than self-promotion alone—including Google’s Eric Schmidt and Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg.
However it’s disguised, virtue signaling, self-promotion or humble bragging can create backfire effects and alienate you from your end goal.
Even if others don’t say they think less of you, they may think it.
Neither Right Nor Wrong
Still can’t decide? You don’t need to prove yourself or seek the approval chased in youth. Both self-promotion and non-promotion contain trade-offs. Neither approach is right or wrong.
As my father used to say: you’ll be judged for what you do and what you don’t do.
So decide deliberately—and then just do what you want.
