Memory
An Awakening to the Possibility of Joy in Life
Personal Perspective: A joyful early memory as the foundation for a joyful life.
Updated April 28, 2025 Reviewed by Margaret Foley
Recently, while enjoying lunch at a local restaurant, I met Alexandra, a member of the wait staff. I was immediately impressed by her delight in serving me and my wife. While sitting at our table, I observed Alexandra interacting with other guests in a way that seemed joyful. After a while, I asked Alexandra, a 22-year-old college student, if she could later share an early recollection with me. When time became available, Alexandra related an early memory: "My twin brother and I were running in our old house in New York. We ran around the couch laughing, butt naked. We were 3 years old." Responding to a follow-up question, Alexandra said, "The most vivid part of the memory was running around." At that point, she "Felt alive. I gained some sort of sentience that I existed. The world puzzle pieces started coming together a little bit." Her feelings were: "Happy, ecstatic."
Interpreting the meaning of an early recollection involves clarifying a theme, personality dimensions, and perceptual modalities (Clark, 2018). In terms of a theme or main idea, Alexandra recognizes that life provides a splendid opportunity for joy and happiness. This awareness involves a freedom and capacity to actively engender enjoyable times, particularly in the company of others. There is a zest in Alexandra's existence reflected in moments of self-discovery and experiences of spontaneous joy. In these instances, she feels an emotional uplift that makes even routine and familiar events satisfying. Laughing, dancing, playing and other celebratory actions in the immediacy of living life makes the journey all for the best. At the same time, while Alexandra attunes herself to a delight in everyday events, she also maintains a realistic perspective of life's challenges and adversities.
Relating to personality dimensions, Alexandra has a high degree of activity involving a vitality of engagement and movement. At times, she finds herself spontaneously dancing and happily moving about. When unable to stand or be mobile for extended periods of time, Alexandra tends to get restless. Her activity pattern also involves periods of self-reflection and contemplation that contribute to feelings of well-being. Activities for Alexandra often relate to simple things in life that are immediately accessible and evoke wonder and hope.
With respect to social interest, Alexandra has a kinship with other living beings and a sense of belonging in the human community. Relationships with people tend to be emotionally uplifting, including fostering the well-being of others with whom she interacts. In these occasions, such as in her food service work, she experiences fulfillment in knowing that patrons find pleasure and a respite from cares while enjoying a meal.
Regarding optimism/pessimism, Alexandra's expectation is that most events in which she participates have a positive outcome. Although she experiences disappointments and sorrows that are a part of living, Alexandra tries to make the best of what she has. This outlook also includes a sense of gratitude and a consciousness that she can personally affect events in a constructive and even joyful way.
Self-efficacy involves a belief in the possibility of surmounting challenges and inevitable letdowns in life. Alexandra maintains a belief in her ability to cope with the support of other people and a sense that she is not alone when facing adversities. Conscientiousness relates to a willingness to assume responsibility and be accountable. Alexandra is a reliable person and people that she knows find her caring and supportive, with an accompanying sense of lightheartedness.
From a perspective of sensory modalities, like most people, Alexandra is oriented to the visual sense. In her interactions with others and moving about, the capacity of vision is critical. At the same time, Alexandra's sense of touch is pronounced, especially as it relates to feeling contact with the floor or ground. Physical activity provides an elevation of energy and emotional satisfaction, especially when it can be done in a playful way.
Alexandra's outlook on life includes the possibility for joy and hope in a world that often is in need of these qualities. Considering how she approaches life, in spite of its challenges and hardships, suggests ways of taking advantage of good fortunes in the moment.
References
Clark, A. J. (2018). Dawn of memories: Therapeutic applications of an early recollections interpretation approach. Journal of Individual Psychology, 74, 351-367.