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Therapy

The 12 Days of Psychotherapy

A new Christmas carol for our time.

Source: Tawesit/Dollar Photo Club
Source: Tawesit/Dollar Photo Club

Verse 1

On the first day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

some insight into my psyche.

Verse 2

On the second day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 3

On the third day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 4

On the fourth day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 5

On the fifth day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 6

On the sixth day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Six good reflections,

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 7

On the seventh day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Seven short assessments,

Six good reflections,

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 8

On the eighth day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Eight million Kleenex,

Seven short assessments,

Six good reflections,

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 9

On the ninth day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Nine labeled feelings,

Eight million Kleenex,

Seven short assessments,

Six good reflections,

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 10

On the 10th day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Ten new perspectives,

Nine labeled feelings,

Eight million Kleenex,

Seven short assessments,

Six good reflections,

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 11

On the 11th day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Eleven ways of coping,

Ten new perspectives,

Nine labeled feelings,

Eight million Kleenex,

Seven short assessments,

Six good reflections,

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Verse 12

On the 12th day of therapy, my therapist gave to me

Twelve probing questions,

Eleven ways of coping,

Ten new perspectives,

Nine labeled feelings,

Eight million Kleenex,

Seven short assessments,

Six good reflections,

Unconditional positive regard,

Four treatment goals,

Three mm-hmms,

Two cups of tea,

And some insight into my psyche.

Bonus verse

On the thirteenth day of Christmas, my therapist gave to me,

an invoice for the preceding 12 sessions, with a polite request to remit payment upon receipt.

If you liked this post, you might also enjoy A Letter from Santa's Therapist.

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