A big hoarding misconception is that if a person hoards they must be crazy.
NOT SO. In common language, the term “crazy” depicts attributes that are derogatory and not helpful. Hoarding can be a symptom of lacking in balance for physical and mental needs. Mental wellness is a continuum that fluctuates and in our worst periods, none of us may score terribly well. We all move up and down that continuum.
The question to ask is, how well are we managing our physical and mental health needs?
Life is a cup which is normally already partially full. What would it take for each of us to misjudge and overload ourselves to the point of becoming overwhelmed? Overwhelmed is the precursor of indecision and procrastination. If our strategies to stay organized are failing, we can become increasingly vulnerable to creating a hoarded environment.
The key is to adapt and keep a healthy balance as the positives and negatives in life occur. Try to make conscious choices about what and how much you can manage in order to maintain the balance of your mental and physical health.
We fill our cup with a mix of positive and negative influences in our life. In Figure 1 you don’t have enough of that mix. In Figure 2 you have just enough mix of positive and negative but there is very little margin for error and no surplus you can draw on when life sends you a challenge, while Figure 3 illustrates that you have spare energy, enabling you to focus, and potentially maximize the positives. The extent to which this is true is what you have in reserve to maintain balance. Figure 4 illustrates going beyond your state of balanced mental and physical health by adding the excess to the capacity of your life’s cup. By Figure 5, you are totally overwhelmed.
1. Running on Empty
You may be experiencing:
- Poor appetite or overeating
- Disrupted sleep
- Low energy or fatigue
- Not feeling good about yourself
- Poor concentration
- Feeling stuck or hopeless
2. Just Enough in the Tank to Manage
You may be experiencing:
- It's an effort to get through your day
- By day's end, you are spent
- Low sex drive
- Moderately susceptible to catching the current virus circulating
- Low or no enthusiasm
- Your bed and the couch feel like a friend
3. Life's Good
You may be experiencing:
- Energy to spare
- Enjoying hobbies and interests
- Available sexual energy
- Feeling confident and competent to handle the unexpected
4. At Your Limit
You may be experiencing:
- Life is out of control
- You are seriously overscheduled
- Unable to muster the focus and energy to finish tasks
- Feeling chronic severe stress every day
- Chronic impatience and frustration
- Small things and noise bother you a lot
- You can't take any more challenges
5. Totally Overwhelmed
You may be experiencing:
- Emotional outbursts
- Temper outbursts
- Feeling underlying irritation and anger most of each day
- Mood fluctuations
- Suicidal thoughts
- Problems at school, work, with family and social relationships
- Low or no sex drive
- Trouble initiating and following through with tasks
- Inability to make decisions
- Difficulty getting out of bed
- Feel like you are running as fast as you can but getting nowhere
- Feeling like you are in the zone
This final picture is a great illustration of the fact that being overwhelmed and stuck has spread into many other areas of your life with significantly negative results.
Begin by asking yourself as often as you can manage:
- What does this choice mean for my physical and emotional wellness balance?
- Does this fill my cup? OR Does it empty my cup?
These two questions are a practical way to support yourself to make conscious choices about what you add and don’t add to your life. They coach you to set healthier boundaries and limits, and to create and maintain the balance and peace you want in your life.
