From Both Sides of the Couch

A therapist reflects on her time with patients, and her time as a patient.

Gerri Luce LCSW

Has My Invitation to Old Age Been Bought?

As I live alone, this event–passing out and hitting my head–scared me. It frightened me more than my stroke. If the fall had resulted in a brain bleed, I could have died.

I Want My Mind and Body to Be Healthy at the Same Time

Since my last post at the end of February, my health has continued to decline and I’ve been totally exhausted. 

National Eating Disorders Awareness Week: Come as You Are

Since the theme of National Eating Disorders Awareness Week this year is “COME AS YOU ARE,” I’ve decided to get as real as possible and post photos of my dentures. 

2018 Was Both a Tragic and Banner Year for Mental Health

2018 has been an important year in raising awareness and fighting the stigma of mental health.Tragically, several celebrities took their own lives.

I'm Back at Work. And It's Harder Than I Expected.

I officially started back to work on Wednesday, November 7th, after some unexpected IT issues (which I should have expected after being out of work for five months!).

The Flow of Gratitude in All Aspects of My Life

The "Out of the Darkness Walk" — and other events of the day — reinforced my feelings of exceptional gratitude I first realized when I was inpatient in the rehabilitation center.

September is National Suicide Prevention Month

Given the tragic events of this past summer with two celebrity suicides, this month, September of 2018 is a crucial month to stand up and support suicide awareness and prevention.

I'm Not, I'm Not, I'm Not, Yeah I'm Depressed

When I was in the rehabilitation center after my stroke, they sent the psychologist to talk to me. He said it was because of my history of depression. 

Life Changed in an Instant; Nothing Is The Same

I didn’t know how long I’d be there, I had no idea what my discharge plan would be, what my prognosis was. The stroke had affected my left side and my cognitive function,

Life Can Change in an Instant

I never thought about the possibility that life could change overnight.

Announcing the First BPD Awareness Walk in the United States

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE, May 3, 2018. The nation’s first ‘Walk for Borderline Personality Disorder’ to raise awareness and advocate for change. May 20th, 2018 in New York City.

I Still Miss My Mom -- And That's Okay.

I was cruising in my new VW when one thought occurred. I was terrified I wouldn’t remember. I never got the opportunity to have a relationship with my mother as a healthy adult.

May Is the Most Important Month of Our Year

May is both Mental Health Awareness Month and the 10th Borderline Personality Disorder Awareness Month!

If I Start Crying, I May Never Stop

On Tuesday, January 16th, Zoe’s vet and I made the difficult decision to put her at peace. There was something different about her that day.

Happy New Year, but With No Resolutions

I don’t recall when I stopped making New Year’s resolutions, maybe two years ago, maybe four; this practice just wasn’t working for me.

My Best Friend, Zoe, My Cat, My Baby Is Dying

I realized my cat, Zoe was losing even more weight; as I held her I could distinctly feel her bony spine.

I'm Gaining Weight and I'm Okay With It

I wanted to gain weight because I didn’t feel well, I had no energy and I continued to live with the consequences of my twenty-six year-long battle with anorexia every day.

I Called Out a Colleague

I couldn’t believe it was actually me. At work, for the last two weeks, I’ve been in an intensive training learning a new computer platform for documenting notes.

Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!

It’s the day after Thanksgiving and I have so much to be grateful for this year.

Pardon Me While My Life Blows Up: A Continuation

I was finally diagnosed with SIBO, a gut issue, that has wreaked havoc and remains unresolved.

Pardon Me While My Life Blows Up

I haven’t posted in a while but life continues to explode. Zoe is doing well; I finally got her to the vet last week on the fourth try. I swear that cat has a sixth sense.

I Feared That I Would Lose My Best Friend

I put her down gently, she took a few steps and collapsed on the floor. It was almost as she was unable to bear her own weight.

I Attended a Conference Devoted to Personality Disorders

This past Friday and Saturday, I had the opportunity to attend a conference presented by the NASSPD or the North American Society for the Study of Personality Disorders.

This Is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week 2017

I was having a great time during the years that led up to my first hospitalization from anorexia. My career as a promotion development manager in New York City was taking off.

A Book Written By Us, For Us, That Understands Us - with BPD

Over a year ago, I saw a call for submissions for stories from individuals who have recovered from borderline personality disorder.

I'm Looking Forward to 2017 Without Therapy

The idea that therapy with my long-time psychiatrist Dr. Adena is over for good has not sunk all the in way yet.

A Surreal Experience

I knew it would happen, but it took a year. One of the hospitals that I cover as part of my work is the psychiatric hospital to which I was admitted numerous times since 1990.

Fire Island: My First Real Vacation in Years

I returned this past Thursday from what may have been my first real vacation since 2005, when my brother generously sent me and my cousin Jamie to Paris.

I Inherited More Than Depression From My Father

It has been quite a while since I’ve posted. I realize that the last time that I didn’t post for this long, I was severely depressed and it led to a suicide attempt.

On This Anniversary Of My Father's Death

Today, April 24, 2016 is the 3rd anniversary of my father’s death. He died after spending 10 days in Cavalry Hospital in the Bronx, NY which is devoted to palliative care.

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