When asked what motivates them, many people are surprisingly vague. And yet deeply understanding your own motivations helps you create the life you want. And when you discover what motivates other people, you can help them fly.
Many of us are addicted to offering our solutions and pearls of wisdom at the slightest opportunity. So often our advice is well intended but unwelcome. Over time this can cause our friends, family and colleagues to stop communicating with us.
Why do we shout at someone we love even though we know it will make things worse? Or trample on people's sentences in a work meeting when we set out to listen? The answer lies in having mindful rather than mindless conversations.
Research shows that most arguments begin with low-grade niggles about leaving sock-fluff on the carpet, unwashed plates next to the sink or flicking TV channels. These situations can quickly escalate into a full-scale row, in which underlying issues get brought into the conversation and both parties end up in The Bad Place.