Self-Help
How Getting Together Fosters Well-Being
The science of community and how it affects our well-being.
Posted October 28, 2024 Reviewed by Monica Vilhauer Ph.D.
Gathering with others in person is important for our overall emotional and physical well-being. Despite the convenience, virtual connections just don’t nourish our bodies and minds as much as face-to-face interactions. Below, we’ll be exploring how gathering with others provides us a wellspring of energy, reduces stress, boosts emotional health, and fosters overall well-being.
The Evolutionary Importance of Social Bonds
Humans are, by nature, deeply social beings. Tracing back to early civilizations, we have always relied on community for survival. Our ancestors created social bonds with each other to help navigate through danger, find resources, and create thriving societies. While these fundamental social needs have remained constant throughout human history, they now manifest in more nuanced ways in our modern day-to-day lives.
This is where the Heliotropic Effect comes into play. Just as plants lean toward sunlight for nourishment, humans gravitate towards connections that provide relational energy. These connections improve our ability to regulate our emotions, making us more resilient in the face of stress and adversity.
Since 2010, a growing body of research around relational energy has brought the importance of our social ties back into the spotlight. Relational energy, or the boost in well-being we get from interactions with others, is a part of the ever-expanding list of how our social behaviors impact our health. A 2024 study found that being in environments that foster the growth of relational energy significantly improved behaviors such as engagement in the workplace as well as increased overall employee well-being (Braha & Karabulut, 2024). This research confirms what many of us intuitively understand: Positive social interactions energize us and contribute to our overall well-being, much like they did for our ancestors.
Mental Health Benefits of Gathering With Others
One of the most significant benefits of gathering with loved ones is its impact on mental health. Regular face-to-face interaction helps lower stress, boost mood, and increase emotional resilience. When we connect with others, our bodies release oxytocin and dopamine—two powerful chemicals that promote feelings of happiness and well-being. One 2023 study during the COVID-19 pandemic found that constructive in-person social interactions improved people’s moods more than those that occurred online. Participants in the study demonstrated higher levels of brain activity and were happier after engaging in meaningful real-life interactions (Monninger et al., 2023). That increased brain activity also supports our cognitive longevity, helping defend our minds from diseases such as Alzheimer’s (Joshi et al., 2024).
These biological responses explain why meaningful social gatherings leave us feeling revitalized: When we spend time with people who love and support us, our bodies and brains work together to create a natural boost in energy and well-being that virtual interactions simply cannot replicate.
Longevity and Physical Health Correlation
There are numerous health benefits that come from having meaningful, in-person social connections, including:
- Enhanced Immune Function: People with robust immune systems are typically those who lead busy social lives. This is partially because social relationships have a stress-relieving impact that can improve the body's resistance to infections and speed up the healing process from diseases (CDC, 2024).
- Increased Longevity: According to a thorough review of 148 research articles with over 300,000 participants, people with strong social relationships showed a 50% lower risk of dying young than people who didn’t. In fact, our relationships are such a strong indicator of longevity that its effect outweighs a number of other lifestyle choices, such as smoking and sedentary behavior. Even the World Health Organization has acknowledged it as a worldwide health priority (Lieberman, 2020).
- Reduced Risk of Chronic Illnesses: Research has demonstrated that social interaction reduces the risk of long-term illnesses like dementia, heart disease, and stroke. Strong social links help reduce these risks by encouraging healthy lifestyle choices, while loneliness-related stress can increase them (CDC, 2024).
Strengthening Social Bonds: It Takes Practice
Building and maintaining strong social bonds doesn’t happen overnight—it takes practice and intention. By focusing on small but impactful actions, you can foster deeper, more meaningful relationships with those around you. Here are three reminders from my book Be the Sun Not the Salt to help you strengthen your social bonds:
1. Show You Care
It’s not enough to just show up—demonstrate your care through small gestures of kindness and support. Whether it’s lending a listening ear, offering help, or expressing appreciation, these actions let others know they matter to you. Showing genuine care strengthens connections and leaves a lasting impact.
2. Hold the Salt
Negative behaviors are like “salt” on the roots of a plant. Complaining, criticizing, or engaging in negativity can deplete those around you. Holding the salt means choosing not to add unnecessary negativity to those around you.
3. Don’t Be a Complexifier
Avoid making situations more complicated than they need to be. Whether it’s overthinking, over-explaining, or creating drama, these actions can strain relationships. Keep things simple, clear, and straightforward.
By practicing these actions consistently, you can nurture relationships that are full of positive energy, making them more resilient and fulfilling over time.
Conclusion
The science of community and its effects on mental health are clear: Gathering with loved ones provides life-sustaining energy that reduces stress, boosts mood, and even promotes physical health. The Heliotropic Effect reminds us that just as plants seek sunlight to thrive, we too should seek out the positive energy that our loved ones provide. This holiday season, make time for community, nurture your social bonds, and let the energy of those you care about help you flourish.
References
Lieberman, M. (2020, July 22). Why your friends make you live longer. BBC Future. https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20240722-why-your-friends-make-you-live-longer
Monninger, Maximilian et al. “The importance of high quality real-life social interactions during the COVID-19 pandemic.” Scientific reports vol. 13,1 3675. 4 Mar. 2023, doi:10.1038/s41598-023-30803-9
Braha M, Karabulut AT. Energizing Workplace Dynamics: Exploring the Nexus of Relational Energy, Humor, and PsyCap for Enhanced Engagement and Performance. Behavioral Sciences. 2024; 14(1):23. https://doi.org/10.3390/bs14010023
"Social Connection." Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, March 27, 2024, https://www.cdc.gov/social-connectedness/about/index.html
Martino, Jessica et al. “The Connection Prescription: Using the Power of Social Interactions and the Deep Desire for Connectedness to Empower Health and Wellness.” American journal of lifestyle medicine vol. 11,6 466-475. 7 Oct. 2015, doi:10.1177/1559827615608788
Joshi, Pallavi et al. “Social connections as determinants of cognitive health and as targets for social interventions in persons with or at risk of Alzheimer's disease and related disorders: a scoping review.” International psychogeriatrics vol. 36,2 (2024): 92-118. doi:10.1017/S1041610223000923