Relationships
The Downside of Myths About Dogs
Tales that wag the dog negatively affect dog-human relationships.
Posted April 12, 2021 Reviewed by Chloe Williams
Key points
- Oversimplified explanations of what makes dogs tick are very often misleading, and usually dogs pay the price for these misunderstandings.
- There is a lot of variation in dogs' personalities, and there is no "universal" canine mind that can explain how dogs should behave.
- Being dog literate, perhaps especially for first-time pandemic dog guardians, can improve the relationship people have with their dogs.
- When we make the effort to listen to what dogs, as unique individuals, are telling us or asking of us, it's a win-win situation.

During the past few months, I've received a large number of emails from people asking questions about the behavior of their dog(s) and their relationship with their canine companion(s). Many are first-time dog "owners" or guardians who have gotten a dog because they were told that it would be good for them—the people—during times of high stress caused by the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic or other situations.
Of course, the quality of life for the dogs must be part of the equation and the relationship must be good for all involved—the humans and the dogs—but far too often many people simply aren't aware of how taking in a canine companion can be a huge game-changer for themselves, their families, and the dog. They need to be sure they want to share their life with a dog and that they're fully prepared to give them the best life possible, a time-consuming process that requires a lot of give-and-take and flexibility.
In a nutshell, pandemic or non-pandemic dogs of all ages can be huge responsibilities and they're not the panacea they're often made out to be during a pandemic or in other times. Furthermore, service dogs, emotional support dogs, or those used in animal-assisted therapy aren't always a cure-all and don't always live up to their humans' expectations and are relinquished for a wide variety of reasons.
Because it's essential to know something about dog behavior—to be dog literate—before getting a dog, there can be some dire consequences when tales about these amazing beings are accepted as facts. Thus, when tales—myths and misleading stories—wag dogs, in the metaphorical sense of misinforming humans about what to expect from their canine companion and then swaying them to do something to their dog based on this flawed information, a lot can go wrong.
Common myths about dogs:
Here are some recent queries I've received. People's concerns are well-founded, but they're based on meme-like myths that make it into predominantly popular literature and other media.
- "My dog doesn't circle before he poops, but I've been told they always do. Is there something wrong with him?" [I wrote back: Dogs don't always circle when before they poop. I know where you read this and it's a myth.]
- "My female dog lifts her leg when she pees, what's going on here?" [Some females lift their legs when they pee, but usually it's not a high raised-leg lift that's more characteristic of males. Most likely, there's nothing wrong with her.]
- "My male dog sometimes squats like a female when he pees? What's wrong with him?" [There's nothing necessarily wrong with him. Some males mix in squats with raised-leg urinations, and no one really knows why. It's possible he has to "go right now" and can't control it, and it's also possible he's pulled a tendon or a muscle and can't comfortably lift his leg. If he seems uncomfortable, a visit to your veterinarian might be in order.]
- "A lot of people don't like Gigi. Is there something wrong with her?" [No, all humans are not "dogs' best friends", and there might not be anything wrong at all.]
- "Jeremiah doesn't love everyone, but I'm told that dogs are unconditional lovers. Is he okay?" [More than likely he's just fine. All dogs are not unconditional lovers.]
- "Maria seems to be bothered by her abusive past, but I'm told that dogs live in the present." [They don't live in the present, and just as our past experiences can deeply affect us, the same is true for dogs and other animals.]
- "My friend told me I wasn't a good dog owner because I take Pollyanna to 2 local dog parks where she has a blast." [Not all dog parks are bad, so if she likes to go, take her where she can have fun on the run with her friends, and if she (or other dogs) don't like to go, it's pretty simple, don't take them. They'll tell you what they like and don't like in this and other situations, so listen to them and honor their wishes.]
- "I've heard that dogs know when they're dying or when their friends are dying or have passed on, but Ozzie doesn't seem to know or in some cases much care." [The jury is still out on what dogs know about death and dying.1]
Other queries have focused on the myths that dogs don't worry—they do—and that they don't have future expectations—they do.2
Dogs are unique individuals.
All in all, when tales about dogs evolve into misleading memes that get humans to do certain things, the dogs, their humans, and dog-human relationships can suffer. While I don't know of any formal studies of how humans misunderstanding dogs have led to people giving up on their dogs and relinquishing them or abandoning them, this surely would be a most valuable area of research.
All too often I get emails saying something like, "I don't get it, I read that dogs should do this or shouldn't do that, but my dog doesn't follow these rules." I usually explain that there really aren't many hard-and-fast rules, and depending on the situation there really is little about which to be concerned.
Not only is it important to put to sleep overarching myths about what dogs should or should not do, it's also essential to recognize the importance of individual differences—marked diversity—among these highly emotional beings. There also are large personality differences among littermates and siblings.3 Dogs are a very diverse lot and simply put, there is no "universal dog" or canine mind—variation isn't noise, but rather important information that can be used to help them and you along.
Because dogs are unique individuals, it's impossible to offer reliable answers to questions about why they are or are not doing something unless we have details about who's involved and context, social and otherwise—for example, who's involved, what's happening, and where. We need to appreciate and embrace the vast individual differences in behavior, personality, and temperament among domestic dogs. What works for Joe and Maria might not work for Harry or Monica.
The lack of detail about some common dog behaviors and individual variability is what makes studying them so exciting. While we know a lot, there's still a lot to learn. It seems like the more I know, the more I say, "I don't know." I'm told other dog researchers also feel the same way. And, just as dog tales can be misleading, so too can sweeping generalizations about the messages being sent by a dog tail.
It's essential to get things right because oversimplified "quick" explanations all too often get things wrong and usually it's the dog who gets the short end of the leash or otherwise suffers because of these misunderstandings.
When we become dog literate, honor who they are as individuals, pay close attention to what we know and don't know, and admit we don't know all there is to know about dogs, it's a win-win for all, and this is something to which we should all aspire. We are dogs' lifelines and they totally depend on us for our goodwill and deep concern with their well-being.
Note: I just came across this interesting essay:
Dog-bite Britain: the problem with the pandemic puppy explosion.
References
Notes
1) For more information on whether dogs know they're dying or if they know other dogs are dying or have died click here.
2) Further discussions of myths about dog behavior and dog-human relationships can be found here.
3) For more information about the importance of paying close attention to the unique personality of individual dogs click here.
Bekoff, Marc. Pandemic Puppy Pandemonium Requires Lots of Time and Love. (Pandemic puppies are all the rage, but adopting a dog is a huge game-changer. Numerous references about dog behavior are included in this piece.)
_____. Are You Ready to Give Another Animal the Best Life Possible?
_____. Do Dogs Know They're Dying?
_____. iSpeakDog: A Website Devoted to Becoming Dog Literate.
_____. Dogs Aren't Hard-Wired "Love Muffins".
_____. Dogs: The More I Know, the More I Say, "I Don't Know".
_____. "Bad Dog?" The Psychology of Using Positive Reinforcement.
_____. "What Do All These Dog Studies Really Mean?"
_____. Canine Confidential: Why Dogs Do What They Do. University of Chicago Press, 2018.
_____. Let Your Dog Tell You If They Want to Go to a Dog Park.
_____. "Why Do People Make Up Myths and Other Stuff About Dogs?"
_____. Are Dogs Really Our Best Friends? (Not everyone considers dogs to be friends, and dogs are picky themselves.)
_____. Are Emotional Support Dogs Always a Cure-All?
_____. Do Animals Worry and Lose Sleep When They're Troubled?
_____. Dogs Think About and Plan For the Future, Don't They? (In a recent essay Stanley Coren notes that this surely is a possibility.)
_____ and Jessica Pierce. Unleashing Your Dog: A Field Guide to Giving Your Canine Companion the Best Life Possible. New World Library, 2019.