To Avoid Burnout Act on Your Deeper Values

Burnout is usually defined as a state of emotional, physical, or mental exhaustion, caused by excessive or prolonged stress. It occurs when we feel overwhelmed or emotionally drained. We lose interest in the tasks we must do and forfeit enjoyment in activities we used to like.

I do not believe that stress alone causes burnout. In my clinical experience, these are the hidden causes:

• Operating without purpose
• Functioning without meaning
• Alienation from deeper values

Here’s a sure burnout formula:

Motivation based on feelings = Burnout

Here’s a sure self-value formula:

Motivation based on the deepest, most humane values (compassion, kindness, respect, tolerance) = Self-Value

You might wonder why I emphasize motivation based on values rather than feelings. I do so because values provide:

• Authenticity
• The best chance of healing emotional injury
• A stronger sense of self
• Stable well-being, independent of transitory feelings

Feelings (as opposed to moods) are transitory, hardly lasting more than a few minutes. And they’re heavily influenced by things that have little to do with who we are.

These things greatly influence everyday feelings:

• Physiological states (pain, discomfort, hunger, and sleep deprivation)
• Ambient temperature of the room
• Habits and conditioned responses

Without core values, we become different people when we feel different, effectively destabilizing the sense of self.

To do our best, we must know:

• What we stand for
• What improvement (however small) we want to bring about in ourselves and our relationships
• What kind of people, workers, partners, and parents we most want to be

To avoid burnout, I write one sentence on each of the above three times per week.

Choose Enduring Value Over Temporary Power

To value is to regard someone or something as important, worthy of appreciation, time, energy, and, if necessary, sacrifice.

To devalue is to regard someone or something as unimportant, unworthy of appreciation, time, and energy.

Valuing enhances the sense of self. Devaluing diminishes the sense of self. Valuing makes us feel more vital, engaged, interested, appreciative — more alive. Life means more to us at the instant we create value, and life means less to us when we’re not creating value.

When we value more than we devalue, our life experience seems good, even though bad things happen. When we devalue more than we value, life experience seems bad, even though good things happen.

To feel temporarily more powerful, we’re likely to violate what is most important to us by acting on what is less important. If you think of the mistakes you’ve made in life, most of them probably involved violating a deeper value by acting on something that was not as important to you. That can include everything from having extramarital affairs to cheating on your taxes to devaluing your child for leaving a towel in the middle of the floor. A desperate pursuit of power invariably causes us to devalue anyone who gets in the way.

We consistently violate more important values by acting on less important feelings and impulses. This is in part due to the brain’s penchant for conserving mental resources. Deeper values do not run on autopilot like feelings, habits, and impulses. Acting on values typically takes conscious judgment and effort, which consume more mental resources.

At the end of the day, we must decide whether improving our lives or at least avoiding burnout is worth the extra effort of acting on deeper values.