There are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma. But that may short-change the future—which starts by our envisioning something better.
The cynically depressed won’t admit to being depressed but will readily admit to being resentful; that sounds like their bad feelings are someone else’s fault.
Through no fault of their own, many people suffer disabling inhibitions that stifle their natural motivation to be compassionate. They cannot heal old hurts.
Once resentment becomes part of an automatic defense system, resolving “issues” gives only the most temporary relief, before the resentment attaches to other behaviors.
Once resentment or anger become part of a person’s defense system, focusing on specifics that trigger resentful or angry response will yield only temporary improvement at best.