Narcissism

Are you in a Relationship with a Narcissist?

The Risks Of Staying In A Toxic Relationship

Posted Jan 27, 2020

For many women and men, finding that perfect person seems like a dream come true. They meet a person who likes the same music, films, and hobbies, and seems to enjoy virtually everything they do, making them a perfect match. 

At the same time, the new partner showers them with gifts, attention, and lovely, romantic gestures. Slowly, the new partner also inserts themselves into all aspects of their lives, pushing out friends and family. While this is often done subtly and with complete rationalization, before long, the individual finds they are on their own, dependent on Mr. or Ms. Right for all of their love, attention, and social interactions. 

This is the point where the relationship often changes. The once Mr. or Ms. Right is now an egocentric and often verbally abusive partner. They need to be at the center of everything, and what they want to do is all that matters. The partner is no longer on the pedestal; it is the narcissist that demands center stage. 

Staying in a relationship with a narcissist is not just challenging; it can be very dangerous and damaging. When relationships become toxic and destructive, the partner is always the one taking the risk while the narcissist continues on with their self-centered and toxic behavior. 

Emotional Risks

Staying in a narcissist relationship means hiding your own emotions and becoming the person the narcissist wants. At the same time, the demand for perfection from the narcissist makes this an impossible task, and anything that is not done to his or her expectations is seen as an intentional slight. 

The narcissist typically becomes more emotionally abusive over time, quickly picking up on any areas of sensitivity or insecurities of the partner and preying on them. This decreases self-esteem and self-worth, while the isolation factor adds to feelings of loneliness and unimportance. 

Physical Risks

Narcissists can become more than just verbally or emotionally abusive. They can become violent and may have extreme types of anger outbursts. Some narcissists may also be addicts or alcoholics, which can further increase the risk of physical confrontations and injuries.

Spiritual Risks

The lack of caring about the partner's emotional well-being or spiritual nature is a key factor in a narcissist relationship. If the partner is spiritual in nature, the narcissist can use this as a weapon or to control or belittle the partner, taking away a core element of their connection to their universal sense of connection and well-being.

Tips for Letting Go

Getting out of a relationship with a narcissist is the most important step to reduce these risks. This can be difficult, but the following strategies provide help and support through the process:

• Make a clean break – move out, get away, and do not continue to talk to or contact the narcissist, including through social media. Getting away removes the control, manipulation, and the charm factor these individuals use to their advantage in holding onto the relationship. 

• Build a support network – reach out and reconnect with family and friends, join a support group, work with a therapist or counselor with experience in helping people out of toxic relationships. 

• Time to heal – stay away from mutual friends of the narcissist, work on your own personal growth and development, and give yourself time to heal and recover. 

Getting away from a narcissist is not easy, but it is essential for your emotional, physical, and spiritual health and well-being. 

References

Lisa Firestone, P. (n.d.). In a Relationship with a Narcissist? What You Need To Know About Narcissistic Relationships. Retrieved from PsychAlive: https://www.psychalive.org/narcissistic-relationships/

Mayo Clinic. (n.d.). Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Retrieved from Mayo Clinic: https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20366662

Spector, N. (2019, September 6). How to Identify a Narcissist- and Cope with their Potentially Toxic Behavior. Retrieved from NBC News: https://www.nbcnews.com/better/lifestyle/how-identify-narcissist-cope-their-potentially-toxic-behavior-ncna1044856