Is Dating Really That Different in July?

How has July been going for you so far? Has it been a big turning point in your romantic life yet? If not, why not, gosh darn it?

After all, the "July Theory" that's been popularized on social media claims that the seventh month of the year tends to be when people go through rather dramatic relationship shifts—like finally exiting a situationship, dropping a Summer fling, solidifying some kind of romantic tie, or, gasp, re-uniting with an ex. And if a theory is propagated on social media, then it must be true and scientifically backed, right? Well, not exactly.

The July theory is no more than a theory that hasn't been supported by real scientific studies. Social media influencers have been presenting mostly anecdotal evidence, which is not hard evidence and not necessarily verifiable. And it's not as if exes have a device implanted in their brains that compels them to return in July like salmon to their spawning site. This doesn't necessarily mean that the July Theory is completely hogwash and that you can't benefit from it, though.

The Rationale Behind the "July Theory"

A big argument behind the theory is that the weather in July can bring change. Weather-wise, July typically is sunny and hot, unless you happen to be in Northern Greenland. Studies have indeed shown that people are more likely to be open and optimistic during the warmer and sunnier months. Sunlight exposure can help boost your mood and broaden your thinking. Moreover, the United Kingdom National Health Services does note how sunlight exposure can also help you better regulate your body's Circadian rhythm and thus sleep patterns. The weather also allows you to be outside more than in the deep winter months, which can enhance social connections and opportunities. All of this sunlight can help you then shed more light onto what's happening to you and your love life.

It's not just the heat of the moment but the timing, too. July is the second month of summer. So, you've had some time to let whatever you've been doing during the summer so far stew or cook for a bit. If, for example, you did start some kind of a summer fling in late May or June, you are now two months into it. That, in theory, has given you some time to assess your body of work and determine whether or not the person you are currently with is any more than just a hot body.

Being in July also gives you enough time to course correct for the rest of the summer. It gives another month or two of potential sun and fun. So, if you look to your left and see that the person you are with is not right, all is not lost for the summer yet. You can still reclaim what time remains.

Just Believing the "July Theory" Could Bring Change

Moreover, there is the whole potential placebo effect in believing the July theory. If you somehow believe that July can help you leave a situationship, re-evaluate your situation in general, or solidify a tie, then gosh darn it, that may end up happening. Belief can be a powerful motivator. Wasn't that the whole point of that song "Believe" that Cher sang?

At the same time, shedding self-limiting beliefs can go a long way. You may be staying in a situationship or some other way-less-than-ideal situation simply because, deep down, you believe you can't do better. But is that really the case? No matter how weird you may think you are, there's likely a good match for you out there. Heck, even those into extreme ironing or competitive duck herding can find their peeps, so to speak.

What if you somehow believe that the past always predicts the future? For example, umpteen years of you not finding the right partner simply means umpteen more of the same. Well, don't be all Humpty Dumpty about it. Things change with time. If the future were so predictable, you'd probably have bought up many more tech stocks and wedge sneakers before the 2010s. Therefore, be more open to possibilities and the possibility that bad trends can change.

So, if someone tells you that July will bring change to your romantic life, you don't necessarily have to grill that person. Maybe, instead, take it as it is and see what July may bring forth to you.

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