The Case for Exploring Self-Esteem

Most of us lead busy lives, so busy that we rarely have a chance to pause, reflect, and examine the way we think and feel about ourselves, our prospects, and the possibilities that await us.

Self-esteem — the degree to which an individual values him, her, or themself, and perceives themselves as capable, strong, and worthy — is among the most studied aspects of human behaviour, and for good reason. Our self-esteem impacts everything from our mental health and relationships with others, to our motivation, courage, and resilience.

A 2023 meta-analysis of longitudinal studies on self-esteem (i.e., how self-esteem impacts individuals over an extended period) examined self-esteem in terms of its impact on social relationships, school, work, mental health, physical health, and antisocial behaviour. It concluded that high self-esteem “helps individuals adapt to and succeed in a variety of life domains, including having more satisfying relationships, performing better at school and work, enjoying improved mental and physical health, and refraining from antisocial behaviour.”

Decades of other research reveal the negative impacts of low self-esteem. A 2025 study examining the longitudinal relationship between self-esteem, life satisfaction, and depressive and anxiety symptoms among Chinese Adolescents revealed that “fluctuations in self-esteem significantly impact changes in life satisfaction and depressive and anxiety symptoms,” and identified the “crucial role of self-esteem in relation to depressive and anxiety symptoms.”

According to a 2021 study by the National Bureau of Economic Research, a whopping “80 percent of women struggle with low self-esteem and shy away from self-advocacy at work.”

The deep roots of self-esteem

Self-esteem and self-worth begin early in life, according to developmental psychologist Eddie Brummelman. In a 2023 interview, he states: “From their youngest years, children form views of themselves, their abilities, and their overall worth,” and cites economic conditions among the driving factors of the inequalities between disadvantaged children and their high-achieving classmates.

A longitudinal study of family environment and self-esteem development of children age 10-16 released in 2021 explored a variety of family-related factors and their impact on child self-esteem. The study looked at numerous challenging factors, including economic hardship and parental depression, as well as potentially beneficial factors, including parental involvement in their child’s education and quality of the parent-child relationship. It concluded that a number of factors, including maternal depression and economic hardship, high levels of parental monitoring, psychological control, and over-protective parenting contribute to low levels of self-esteem in children and teens.

Addressing low self-esteem and self-worth

We are all born into families, and from the day we are born, we watch, learn, and absorb the positive and negative conditions, attitudes, and actions of our parents and caregivers without question or consideration. E,ven when our world expands, our thoughts about who we are, what we can accomplish, who we should be, and what we deserve — whether they are positive or negative, and regardless of their impact on our sense of self-worth and self-esteem — continue to shape our lives.

The reality is that our self-esteem is not set in stone. Our role models and caregivers, and the blueprints and core beliefs they pass along to us, need not keep us stuck in patterns of low courage and self-worth. Through self-compassion and a willingness to challenge our long-standing negative beliefs about what we deserve, can accomplish, and are worthy of, we can reframe and replace outdated, inaccurate, and maladaptive thoughts, perceptions, and self-beliefs that hold us back from achieving our goals with more positive, accurate, and adaptive ones, and move forward with an enhanced self-esteem that supports us as we strive to create the life we want and deserve.

5 steps to examining and enhancing self-esteem

1. Identify the persistent negative thoughts and self-limiting beliefs that you hold onto, and that hold you back from taking meaningful risks or believing in your ability to handle life’s challenges. Think about the times when your self-limiting beliefs about what you deserve and can accomplish have prevented you from pursuing a goal or developing a social connection or relationship.

2. Pay attention to your self-talk. The way you talk to yourself is a key indicator of your sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Self-talk reinforces your self-limiting beliefs and can inflict pain and suffering. Suffering has a purpose, and that purpose is to compel us to shift and change.

3. Challenge self-limiting beliefs about what you can achieve, what you deserve, and what you are capable of taking on. Remember: Just as an unexamined life is not worth living, an unchallenged negative thought or self-limiting belief is not worth holding onto.

4. Replace the outdated, untrue, and maladaptive self-beliefs that hold you back from creating the life you want with more adaptive, accurate, and supportive ones.

5. Seek the help of a mental health professional if you are overwhelmed and struggling with low self-worth and self-esteem. A compassionate mental health professional can provide you with the skills, strategies, and tools to help build your self-esteem and move forward with confidence, resilience, and positivity.

To find a therapist, visit the Psychology Today Therapy Directory.