Essential Reads

The Scientific Case for Owning Up to Your Porn Use

Women are happier when they believe their partners are honest about porn habits.

Theo Fleury Is Teaching Us How to Heal

Hockey great explains power of conversation

Empathy for a Child Abuser?

Empathy for the Undeserving Can Be a Useful Strategy for Changing Families

How to Feel Better When You’re Feeling Bad

Buddhist-inspired wisdom for navigating difficult times.

Recent Posts on Therapy

My Wife Drove My Son to Suicide

What to do when your wife hates your son

Mourning – Death, Loss, Trauma, and Psychotherapy

Mourning is the process by which we heal from grief. I’ve heard people say, “What’s the point of grieving, you can’t bring a loved one back from the dead.” That of course, is true, but it is what allows us, the survivors, to return back to the land of the living and resume our lives.

Carl Rogers' Person-Centered Approach

Is non-directive therapy the same as client-centered therapy?

How Are You Dancing With Life?

We think life is static, but in reality, it is always in movement. If we are open to that movement, we discover who we are and who we are becoming.

The Scientific Case for Owning Up to Your Porn Use

Many people believe that porn use should be hidden from a relationship partner. However, a new study suggests that when women think their partners are honest about their porn use, they tend to be happier with their relationships.

Letting Go of Self-Destructive Behaviors

By The Book Brigade on March 03, 2015 in The Author Speaks
The millions of teens and adults who engage in self-destructive behavior do so because they never learned more constructive ways of soothing themselves in moments of distress. Many have engaged in such behaviors for so long that they can't envision a way out. But it's possible to replace self-destructive acts with kinder means of coping.

Happiness With Life 6: Serve Yourself a Slice of Happiness

I don't care how physicists define time. Time, to me, is choice. This blog, Serve Yourself a Slice of Happiness, provides the mindsets and strategies to choose pleasure each and every day of our lives.

Balancing Inhibition and Exhibition

By Gregg Levoy on March 03, 2015 in Passion!
The desire to keep your spark, your life-force, intact, will always have to contend with agents of decay and distraction. All the forces of resistance and inhibition, from within and without, that can rob you of your vitality if you let them. Here's how to referee that boxing match.

A Visit to the Psychiatric Hospital Made Me Sick

By Noam Shpancer Ph.D. on March 03, 2015 in Insight Therapy
Our psychiatric inpatient care system is insufficient and often detructive. But the inpatient population is not a wealthy, vocal, or well-organized pressure group. In our current cultural moment, without a strong voice in the Halls of Power, you may well end up wandering aimlessly down the corridors of an ill-staffed and ill-equipped hospital ward, talking to yourself.

Theo Fleury Is Teaching Us How to Heal

By Michael Friedman Ph.D. on March 03, 2015 in Brick by Brick
Former professional hockey player Theo Fleury is no stranger to confrontation, both on and off the ice. In 2009, he bravely and publicly confronted a very personal issue—sexual abuse and alcoholism. He explains how communication is pertinent to well-being, and even though the road ahead may not be easy, he truly believes that people can learn to heal.

Asexuality is Not a Diagnosis

Sometimes people who disbelieve in asexuality insist that their objections are scientific, but said claims ignore that sexual orientation is not an objectively proven conclusion. It is, by definition, a subjective experience, and it should not be treated like a scientific statement that must be held to rigorous experimental standards.

Drawing From Moments of Serenity

By Hal Mathew on March 02, 2015 in Unagoraphobic
Learning a new skill will give you meditative, calming periods of time each day

The Borderline Mother II

A borderline mother can you hurt a child (even an adult child) in the blink of an eye. Here's what happens and how you can respond.

Empathy for a Child Abuser?

Empathy for a child abuser? For a child molester? How can anyone be empathic with someone who has done something so terrible? Why would they want to? Do the perpetrators possibly deserve such a thing? For a judge or prosecutor, of course not. For stopping repetitive dysfunctional family interactions that trigger someone's self-destructive behavior? Necessary.

How to Feel Better When You’re Feeling Bad

When you feel down, discouraged or frustrated, Buddhist concepts and techniques can offer surprising relief. Here's some starter key ideas, and info on an accessible and engaging guide that can help you to learn more.

How Youth Wind Up Taking Antipsychotic Medications

Yes, the number of kids taking antipsychotic medications is rising, but what does that mean? A new study begins to illuminate the process being the prescriptions.

Blank Spaces of Memory

By Bruce Poulsen Ph.D. on March 01, 2015 in Reality Play
Memory’s underpinnings have long been explored by artists and writers—from Klimt to Proust. Some contemporary works also deserve our attention.

Because I Hurt When She Hurts

Tim and Kelly shifted from being critical and angry to working together to build a positive future. Their psychotherapy group for couples gives feedback about the impact of knowing a couple who practices positivity daily.

Evaluating a Counselor, Coach, or Psychotherapist

By Marty Nemko Ph.D. on March 01, 2015 in How To Do Life
Evaluation may be the most valuable skill we're not taught. I attempt to do so in this article.

Meaning is Where the Action Is

Whether a therapist’s expression of emotional understanding will produce therapeutic or counter-therapeutic effects will depend on the emotional meanings that such expressions have for the patient.

8 Warning Signs Your Lover is a Narcissist

The Mayo Clinic research group defines narcissistic personality disorder as “a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration." How do you know when your romantic partner may be a narcissist? Here are eight telltale signs...

How Fault-Finding Destroys Loving Relationships

Do you really understand what destroys relationships?

What Happened to Lunch?

By Susan M. Pollak MTS, Ed.D., on February 28, 2015 in The Art of Now
Why have we stopped eating lunch?

Dismantling “Major Depression”

Almost forty years after the publication in 1980 of the epic third edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) of the American Psychiatric Association, it is starting to become apparent that psychiatry made a historic mistake in getting rid of its traditional three or four depressive illnesses.

Why the "Eat Less, Move More" Approach Often Fails

Why the "Eat Less, Move More" Approach Often Fails. Not all calories are the same, By Susan Kolod, Ph.D.

ADHD and Weed: What’s the Draw?

Does marijuana help with ADHD?

Is Good Psychotherapy Worth the Investment?

By Judith Coche Ph.D., ABPP on February 26, 2015 in No Ordinary Life
Nick, age 55, gets unstuck when he and wife Barbara join together to invest in their own depth therapy to deal with how to feel passion, be more cognitively flexible, and create a happier marriage. They are glad they did.

Study Finds Habits in Children Take Root by Age 9

By Rebecca Jackson on February 26, 2015 in School of Thought
The research is eye-opening for many parents who hope their children will eventually take on more responsibility. The evidence is clear; it's not happening without intervention. This article examines the new research and provides parents with an updated guide of age age appropriate responsibilities to build self-sufficiency in children.

How to Tidy Your Home Mindfully

By Marlynn Wei M.D., J.D. on February 26, 2015 in Urban Survival
Could the cluttered state of your home be holding you back? Marie Kondo's method of decluttering is about more than tidying the home—surrounding yourself with things that bring you joy can help you achieve a greater clarity and awareness of the mind, too.

An Integrative Approach to Wellness Really Works

I had a cerebral bleed causing me to black out resulting in a serious automobile collision. Months later I had brain surgery. I was told by my doctors I was permanently brain damaged. Determined to get better, I set out on my journey to regain my life. So I experimented with a variety of different approaches to treatment, and got better!