Essential Reads

How to Be Empathetic

Find out what you can do to improve your relationships

Losing My Mindfulness: A Tale of Spilled Milk and Blue M&Ms

How a little mindfulness can change your perspective, your brain, and your day.

Good Enough Sex vs. Perfect Individual Sex Performance

Achieving realistic, fulfilling relations

The Critical Difference Between Explanations and Excuses

Do you offer explanations or do you make excuses for your mistakes?

Recent Posts on Self-Help

How to See Yourself More Clearly

Writing can help you see yourself more clearly

Behaviours for Winners

Winning behaviours to help you get what you want and want what you get.

The Melancholy of Anatomy: Excessive Weight and Depression

Does a depressive disorder lead to weight gain or does weight gain lead to a depressive disorder? Studies in the past few years seem to indicate a “bidirectional relationship” between excessive weight and depression, with major public health implications.

The Long Hot Pressure: Cool it With Micro-Successes

It is hard to stay motivated for the long run but easier if you take this suggestion.

3 Ways to Make Your Work More Meaningful

People who believe that their lives have meaning and purpose share a whole host of healthy benefits: they are happier, feel more in control over their lives, feel more engaged at work (and high engagement usually means less burnout), report less depression and anxiety and less workaholism.

What Keeps You From Being Unconditionally Self-Accepting?

The desire to become your personal best is normal—and it’s admirable. But wanting to become better than others, not so much . . . maybe not at all. For, so defined, this particular goal reflects an inflated, aggressive, and possibly domineering ego. If you genuinely see yourself as unique—for, after all, there’s never been anybody exactly like you, then . . .

3 Reasons Why Intuition is a Sacred Gift

Give your intuition a chance and you'll give yourself the biggest gift of your life.

Do You Enjoy Paradox?

Leaders today describe the world as volatile, ambiguous, changing, and complex—a world full of disruption that demands resilience.

Take Your Mental Health “Pill” Every Day!

A depressed client of mine once remarked—“I found out I need to take my signature strengths pill every day.” She was speaking of the research-based psychology intervention of “use 1 of your signature strengths in a new way each day.”

Irrelationship Is Not Codependency

Codependency may sometimes dovetail with irrelationship to the point that they’re not easily distinguishable. They may sometimes seem like kissing cousins, but at the level of purpose and of points of origin, they’re decidedly not identical twins.

Red Flags of Potentially Toxic Relationships

While most of us know at some level that a relationship has turned toxic, we may have a hard time admitting that we have made a poor choice in placing our trust in another.

Anxious? Your Body May Be Trying to Tell You Something

Many people try to ignore, deny, or suppress their emotions. As an emotional energy builds within, they are unable to identify its source. The result? Anxiety. The cure? Increasing self-awareness and affect tolerance.

The Quiet Zone

Quietness and solitude don't have to be enemies - once we get used to them, we'll find that they have a great calming and healing effect.

Be Very Afraid: Uncertainty, Fear, and Achievement

Adventure is defined by uncertain outcome. The most significant moments of our lives, the most important decisions and the most meaningful choices are characterized, in part, by uncertainty and by fear. Without uncertainty we have a safe, contained, and predictable experience; we don’t have adventure.

Leaders, Followers, and Trust

Actions speak louder than words, but words provide the backdrop for how actions are judged. How is that measurement for you? What impact is your word-action alignment having on your ability to build trust with those you lead?

You Won’t Find Happiness at the Finish Line

By Jim Taylor Ph.D. on May 18, 2015 in The Power of Prime
We devote immense amounts of time, effort, energy, and money. Yet, that pursuit seems to be wholly unsatisfying and ineffective, as evidenced by the fact that there exists a ‘happiness-industrial complex’. One place that many people look for happiness is at the finish line. Yet, I can assure you that it can’t be found there.

Is There Ever Just One Side To A Story?

By Allison Carmen on May 18, 2015 in The Gift of Maybe
Sometimes it's hard to imagine how someone else could have another perspective when we feel so right about how we perceive a situation. But if we are willing to pause and think about why the other person feels the way that they do, we might open our hearts a bit and realize MAYBE there is more to the situation than meets the eye.

How to Be Empathetic

“All you ever wants to do is try to fix things.” “You just don't get it.” Judgments like these and countless others verbalized or thought in the context of interpersonal relationships point to one popular problem: the lack of empathy for the other. This blog provides nine guidelines for addressing this block to successful relationships.

Have You Ever Been Told You Were Needy?

Oftentimes, needy is about reacting to the other—feeling neither heard nor understood.

5 Elements of Adventure: Authenticity, Purpose, Inspiration

Adventure is not reserved for youth or extreme sports. Adventure is a lifestyle choice. There is adventure in everything.

Anxiety and Self-Doubt: Perfect Recipe for Underachievement

So many of us are afflicted with negative, left-over-from-childhood, programming that keep us from reaching our full potential. In my many years as a psychologist, the two self-defeating inscriptions I’ve encountered most are “I’m not good enough” and “I can’t succeed” (or “will fail”). And there are many other self-defeating beliefs that hold us back. . . .

Losing My Mindfulness: A Tale of Spilled Milk and Blue M&Ms

What I know to be true experientially is what scientific research now proves—that mindfulness meditation literally changes the brain. Take a brief thirty seconds and give it a try. Right here, right now.

Turn Your “If Only” Into "As If"

As much as individuals like to lament how life might be "if only" things had been different, it is much more empowering to live your life "as if" you were the person you know you are meant to be!

Are You Your Thoughts?

How an objective leader handles negative thoughts

Good Enough Sex vs. Perfect Individual Sex Performance

Sex does not equal intercourse and intercourse and orgasm is not a pass-fail sex test.

Self-Talk: Create-Your-Own Anxious, Depressed or Happy Moods

Your self-talk can keep you feeling good. It also can make you prone to slide into depression or anxiety. This quiz can help you become aware of ways in which your self-talk habits may be helping or hurting your emotional state.

Campus Suicide

Conflict between expectations and forlorn self

The Critical Difference Between Explanations and Excuses

Explanations help you learn from your mistakes. Excuses will damage your relationships and sabotage your chances of success.

How To Let Hope and Time Guide You Through Depression

When depression becomes your familiar state, it can be scary to wade into the uncharted territory of feeling better.

To Weigh or Not to Weigh?

By Emily T. Troscianko on May 14, 2015 in A Hunger Artist
What do the act of self-weighing, and those numbers on the scales, represent in anorexia and recovery? Is weighing yourself during recovery likely to do more harm or good?