Essential Reads

5 Signs You're Trying too Hard to Please Everyone

It's hard to look out for yourself when you have no boundaries.

10 Uncommon Tips For Addressing The Self-Esteem Paradox

The more you like yourself, the less you need to defend yourself.

Recent Posts on Resilience

The Rock-Bottom List

By Jaime Kurtz Ph.D. on August 30, 2015 in Happy Trails
A strategy for when life gets you down.

The Crucial Factor in Making Real Change in Your Life

Disrupting just one unskillful behavior, for instance using silence to punish, or making critical, judgmental remarks, or being bossy by giving commands, can lead to a whole series of positive shifts.

How to Move on From an Ex You Still Love

By Jennice Vilhauer Ph.D. on August 29, 2015 in Living Forward
Nothing can keep you from moving on to a better future than a lingering relationship wound. While time is ultimately the best of all healers there are some concrete steps you can take that will facilitate the healing process.

Curing Excuse-Making Syndrome

By Marty Nemko Ph.D. on August 29, 2015 in How To Do Life
It feels good to externalize responsibility but that often leads to career and life failure.

How Parents Can Help Their Child Build Self-Confidence

by Dona Matthews & Joanne Foster. One of the greatest gifts a parent can give a child is self-confidence. Help her understand her unique ability profile, show him that all learning happens in small steps, support her in developing her interests, be available as needed especially in times of change, and help him welcome setbacks as learning opportunities.

The Superhuman Athlete

Find out how Olga Kotelko stays fit physically and mentally at the age of 95.

The Sin of Being Perfect

Voltaire wrote perfect is the enemy of good. Perfect is also the enemy of the authentic.

Abstract Ideas Lead to Real-World Resilience

By Polly Campbell on August 25, 2015 in Imperfect Spirituality
Your ability to bounce back from challenge may be all in your imagination.

Meeting People Where They Are

The Resilience Regiment speaks with Foundations Nashville.

5 Stress Resilience Strategies for Students

A recent APA Stress survey, reporting specifically on the stress levels of teens, found that during the school year many teens report stress levels higher than reported by adults. Teens often underestimate the potential impact stress has on their physical and mental well-being. Teens and college students can manage the effects of stress by building their stress resilience

Four Necessary Voices in Your Resiliency Network

By Robert Wicks Ph.D. on August 24, 2015 in The Resilient Life
Examining the four types of friends every person should include in their network: the prophet, cheerleader, harasser, and inspirational friend.

Bright Girls Are Always the Meekest in Class

Research has found the higher a girl's IQ the more likely she was to give up when a question was complex or a task was challenging. Bright girls were more easily intimidated. Bright boys ,were more likely to see not knowing an answer as invigorating. They were not intimidated and more confident than girls even though girls performed better on tests.

Growing Confident: Parenting to Shatter Boundaries

If we are not willing to be vulnerable – to feel just a little bit unsafe – we will never bump into our boundaries hard enough to shatter them.

Great Relationships Require Hard Work, But Not Forever

Relationships, we think, should not have to be this hard. Well, that’s true. They shouldn’t be relentlessly difficult, at least not on a permanent basis, otherwise who, other than a masochist would consciously choose to live in a state of perpetual struggle.

4 Things Pixar's Inside Out Can Teach Parents About Emotions

By Tamar Chansky Ph.D on August 21, 2015 in Worry Wise
Every time we see tears in our children's eyes our inner control panel goes through the same process —we want to body dive sadness and get it off our kids — fast. I would say that this lesson to not fear our children's sadness is the one that we have to relearn just about every time we see tears. I don't want my kids to be sad.

Helping Kids Thrive in Middle School and High School

Early adolescence is a time of vulnerability and possibility, and whether they realize it or not, young people need their parents as much as they did as toddlers. Kids are moving toward independence, but parents still have an enormous role making sure they are safe, and increasing their chances of creating happily productive adult lives for themselves. Here are 10 ideas.

Look to Your Own Life

By Saul Levine M.D. on August 19, 2015 in Our Emotional Footprint
You Don't Need the Kardashians!

Make It a Happy Start to School: Our Top 10 Secrets

Here are some ideas for parents who want to ease their child’s return to the classroom. There are thoughts on planning ahead, paying close attention, nurturing creativity, being reassuring, making real-world connections, encouraging exploration, supporting good work habits, making time for play, finding a healthy balance, and advocating as needed.

Forgiveness, Acceptance, Compassion -- and Suicide

I don’t write these words -- acceptance, forgiveness, compassion -- as if they are tiny words, like ‘it’ or ‘to.’ They are enormous words, like ‘and’ or ‘but.’ In them lies tremendous potential, so much unknown.

Ten Steps Out When Stuck in Doubt

By Jeff Bell on August 19, 2015 in Beyond the Doubt
Struggling with doubt? Try making belief. Read on for the four necessary ingredients and a simple recipe for putting them all together.

Unconscious Memories Hide In the Brain but Can Be Retrieved

By Christopher Bergland on August 17, 2015 in The Athlete's Way
Researchers at Northwestern University have identify a unique brain mechanism used to store and retrieve unconscious memories.

The Potential of the Aging Mind

Why the a comprehensive perspective on the aging brain is key and how the latest neuroscience research combats commonly held beliefs about the aging brain's inevitable, progressive decline

Evolutionary Mismatch

Neuroplasticity in action

Bounce Back: 11 Ways to be More Resilient

11 science-backed activities to help you deal with stress.

We Shall Overcome

Upside is designed to inspire and provide practical tools for a fuller and more fulfilled recovery to the millions of Americans who have experienced, or will experience, a traumatic event. The book lays out actions that have a solid track record of promoting positive growth, including narrative reframing, problem-focused coping, social support, and expressing gratitude.

How Superman Handles Pressure

You might be able to leap buildings in a single bound and change the course of mighty rivers, but can you handle pressure?

A Mom-tervention

How do you find the courage to resist a bully? My cousin found it when her mother urgently needed protection from her father. They tried to sneak away when he wasn't looking, but the cat escaped and my cousin had to go back and face her Dad. In that moment, she learned to believe in her power to set boundaries. She will enjoy that skill forever.

5 Signs You're Trying too Hard to Please Everyone

Mentally strong people don't try to please everyone.

5 Ways the Fear of Rejection Holds You Back

Whether you opted out of asking someone on a date, or you chose not to apply for a promotion, the fear of rejection can be debilitating.

What Differences Do Bystanders Make?

By Sherry Hamby Ph.D. on August 11, 2015 in The Web of Violence
A study in Psychology of Violence found that a witness was present in nearly 2 out of 3 instances of victimization, and that helpful bystanders had long-lasting impacts on the victims.