Essential Reads

How to Put Yourself in Someone Else’s Shoes

Empathy works by analogy, mirror neurons, or embodied simulation.

8 Secret Body Language Cues That Can Control Your Behavior

How others can trigger your senses and emotions.

When Adults Struggle With Their Relationships

At holidays, the focus is on family - some siblings do not get along though

Why Are So Many Indian Arranged Marriages Successful?

The upsides of relinquishing choice, deciding quickly, & lower expectations

Recent Posts on Relationships

What's Your Heart Saying?

By Rick Hanson Ph.D. on October 20, 2015 Your Wise Brain
Naming the truth - in particular the facts of one's experience, which no one can disprove - with simplicity and sincerity, and without contentiousness or blame, has great moral force.

Slow Touching Isn't Just for Women

By Temma Ehrenfeld on October 20, 2015 Open Gently
Slow meditative touch can intensify pleasure and emotion even in a man who thinks foreplay is all for a woman.

Do You Love the Excitement of Being Snowed In?

By Gretchen Rubin on October 20, 2015 The Happiness Project
Drawing from May Sarton's writings on the subject of what makes home feel homey.

5 Signs You Might Be Dating a Man-Child

Consider if you are dating someone you will have to carry along in life or a real partner you can depend upon. What appears fun and sexy now, could eventually become deadweight that you have to carry along with your children, household duties and finances. Here are 5 signs that you might be dating a “man-child.”

Small Acts of Generosity and the Neuroscience of Gratitude

Neuroscientists have identified the brain circuitry that explains how and why small acts of generosity create the positive emotions of gratitude.

8 Ways Real Listening Will Help Your Relationships

Effective communication built on the bedrock of effective listening is vital to the development of empathy in any relationship. Such listening is the primary tool for: a. Disarming the anxiety driving irrelationship; and, b. Opening the way for intimacy. Here we present a list of some of the most powerful characteristics of listening to empower effective communication.

5 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Strong After Having a Baby

Research shows that new parents are the most uniformly dissatisfied group when it comes to marital happiness. Here are five ways to not become one of those statistics.

TANGO: An Expression of Contemporary Relationships

By Ana Nogales on October 20, 2015 Family Secrets
Without mutual respect and trust, neither dance partners nor romantic partners can flourish.

Male Intimacy

By Sam Louie MA, LMHC on October 19, 2015 Minority Report
Studies show that in the United States it is very difficult to have a good friend whom you can trust to unload your burdens. And if you're a guy, the likelihood of that drops even further as many men substitute their spouses or girlfriends for that role. Yet male intimacy is how men are wired traditionally and culturally but has been lost through the ages.

8 Ways to Survive Awkward Conversations

You can't always avoid an awkward conversation, but you can take steps to make them more comfortable.

How to Talk to Your Children About Bullying

By Kyle D. Pruett M.D. on October 19, 2015 Once Upon a Child
Be aware that preschoolers can bully and be bullied on a daily basis. Most of it is not lethal, but a lot of it hurts and shames—both are feelings that can ruin their day and stay with them for a long time.

What Really Happens When a Couple Splits

By Jeremy E Sherman Ph.D. on October 19, 2015 Ambigamy
Why do exes say such harsh things about each other? Why, in breakups of all kinds do we go from being able to do no wrong to being able to do no right? After years of harmonizing stories, breakups lead us to tell divergent stories.

The Neuroscience of… Everything!

Do we really need neuroscience to prove what our gut already knows?

Coupling: Present. Tense!

The legality of the increased range of variations in human coupling has created a complex interpersonal situation for all involved.

10 Tools for Your Weekly Family Meeting

Holding a weekly family meeting will be one of the highest return investments you will ever make. I believe that parents have two jobs: to teach their children how to love, and to teach them how to live without their parents. The family meeting will help you accomplish both of these goals.

Kylie Jenner and Tyga: Fighting, Good or Bad?

By Jane Greer Ph.D. on October 19, 2015 Shrink Wrap
Can arguing bring you closer?

When a Friend's "Helpful Comments" Go Too Far

Do you really want your friend to answer the question, "Do these jeans make me look fat?" honestly -- no matter who's around -- or is there a preferred time and place for the "Denim Inquisition" or other "touchy" topics?

After the Breakup, Part 2

By Romeo Vitelli Ph.D. on October 19, 2015 Media Spotlight
A study by Carin Perilloux and David Buss of the University of Texas at Austin suggests that both men and women rely on a variety of different coping strategies to get over a breakup. Regardless of gender, rejectees are more likely to use positive strategies such as discussing the breakup with friends as well as negative strategies such as crying and pleading.

How Deep Is Our Love?

The world is not feeling very compassionate. But it is. Or better put, we are.

Red Flags for Emotional Caretakers, Part Two

Do you find it hard to notice when you are giving up your own needs and feelings and caretaking others? Here are some red flags to help you notice when you are doing too much caretaking of others.

'Grit' Training for Babies?

By Darcia Narvaez Ph.D. on October 18, 2015 Moral Landscapes
The idea of “grit” is hot right now. Schools and businesses are taking up an emphasis on grit, the perseverance to get a job done. Is it good for babies? Nope, and here’s why.

9 Keys to Handling Hostile and Confrontational People

Most of us encounter confrontational and hostile people at some point in our lives. On the surface, they may come across as domineering, demanding, or even abusive. However, an astute approach and assertive communication style, may help you turn aggression into cooperation, and coercion into respect.

The Top 9 Relationship Deal Breakers

When we think about what we want in a romantic partner, we often focus on our dealmakers. But we also have our dealbreakers—qualities that would disqualify someone as a dating prospect. New research investigates the most common relationship dealbreakers and how they affect our dating choices.

What It Really Means to Love Yourself

We often hear that it is important to love ourselves. But what does this actually mean? This article explores ways to love and care for ourselves in a deeper way.

How to Help Someone in an Abusive Relationship

By Shawn M. Burn Ph.D. on October 17, 2015 Presence of Mind
Is a friend or relative in an abusive intimate relationship? How can you best help?

Sons and Mothers

By Nick Luxmoore on October 17, 2015 Young People Up Close
Sons grow up and become men but do their relationships with their mothers really change?

5 Relationship Red Flags You Have to Watch Out For

Everyone knows the feeling of being in a relationship where something doesn’t feel quite right, but you stick it out anyhow. However, even if you don't like admitting those red flags exist, your relationship will be better off if you do.

Friends Are the New Family

By Alexis Hatcher on October 16, 2015 Psy-College-y Today
Although college is largely portrayed as an academic endeavor, other areas of life shouldn’t be neglected so that a degree can be pursued—I’d argue, in fact, that these require even greater attention.

The Science of Addiction and Recovery

Common sense says that something becomes addictive because of its intrinsically powerful attraction. Johann Hari and other have shown that this is wrong, and that the context is crucial. By context they mean the history of emotional abuse, neglect, and isolation. Recovery groups, at their best, work because they provide a contradictory context of love and community

It Is Possible to Avoid Arguments: Part 2

Arguments can be avoided, and when we consider the futility of trying to resolve differences by efforts that are coercive, controlling, and manipulative, the motivation to learn more effective ways of dealing with differences can grow exponentially.