Essential Reads

Apocalypse Again: Why Can't We Get Enough?

Unpacking why we love the threat of disaster

How Facebook Affects Our Relationships

Whether Facebook helps or harms your relationship depends on how you use it.

Infatuation, Temptation? How To Think Less About That Person

Telling yourself to stop may not be enough.

How Evolutionary Psychology Illuminates Everyday Life

10 Cliches that all have an evolutionary basis

Recent Posts on Relationships

Holiday Blues: Single in the City

By Robert L Leahy Ph.D. on December 12, 2010 in Anxiety Files
You are sitting at home alone, no one to share your Christmas spirit with. All alone, you wonder what is wrong with you. " What can you do to make the Holidays better?

Four Reasons Smart People Make Stupid Dating Decisions

By Linda Young Ph.D. on December 10, 2010 in Love in Limbo
Every guy or girl in a bar looks more irresistible when you're sex or relationship-starved.

The Reality of Love

By Ann Smith on December 10, 2010 in Healthy Connections
Maintaining a healthy amount of connection, respect, tenderness and acceptance will ensure the magic returns from time to time. It isn't the same as chemistry but it is much more valuable and lasting.

It Gets Better: Helping or Hurting?

Dan Savage's "It gets better" campaign to reach out to youth in order to reduce suicide has exploded on the internet. There are submissions from politicians, TV stars and musicians.  Can a video from a stranger prevent suicide? Or is it just lip service?

The Science of Effective Apologies

By Guy Winch Ph.D. on December 09, 2010 in The Squeaky Wheel
Once a problem arises in a relationship, the best way to begin the process of healing the rupture and rebuilding trust is for the offending party to offer an authentic apology. However, for our apology to be effective we have to first listen to the offended party to determine what matters to them.

Does He Love Me? I Want to Know. (And Here's How to Tell.)

According to new research, romantic feelings like love, intimacy, and commitment reliably lead to some loving behaviors, but not others.

Throw Love at Him! C'mon! It's Kindergarten!

Women who have been abandoned often ask me about forgiveness. Is it necessary to forgive to completely heal and how to go about that? I've not known how to answer them, not feeling the need to forgive what my husband did to me, or maybe not wanting to.

Elizabeth Edwards' Secret Weapon

By Melinda Blau on December 08, 2010 in Consequential Strangers
How the ability to connect helped Elizabeth Edwards live a good life despite all she endured.

The Key to an (Almost) Perfect Partnership

Not too long ago my friend Jeff and I were sitting in a bar discussing the trials, tribulations and triumphs of life, work, kids and - more than anything else - relationships. At one point he turned to me and said, "You know, it's too bad you'd look like sh*t in a dress".

Could she be suffering from friendship fatigue? Could you?

By Irene S Levine Ph.D. on December 08, 2010 in The Friendship Doctor
Lately though, I am feeling weary about friendship. That probably sounds odd. But I think I might need some kind of a break from friends, people, and all the effort and confusion that goes into relationships. Don't get me wrong--I'm not about to go live in a cave--and other aspects of my life (work, marriage) are going well.

Handling a friend who needs to have the upper hand

By Irene S Levine Ph.D. on December 07, 2010 in The Friendship Doctor
I'm 18 years old and my best friend and I have been friends for seven years. We went to middle school and high school together and even though we aren't at the same college, we are still very close. In the past year or so my best friend has developed a few obnoxious habits that have made me want to avoid her.

Just This One Moment, Please . . .

By Alida Brill on December 07, 2010 in Chronic Healing
I watched the silken grains of sand as they slipped from the top to the bottom of the cylindrical glass vials. Then I turned them over and began again. As I waited for the one-minute, three-minute, or hour of sand shift from top to bottom, it did not cross my mind the time it represented was lost forever.

The Best Christmas Gift: Stop a Divorce

By Rachel Clark on December 07, 2010 in Marry, Divorce, Reconcile
In The Name of "Special" Love.


There is so much to focus upon to get through the increasingly difficult task of maneuvering our way through airport parking lot buses, terminals, baggage handling, security check points, gates and planes, that we may forget the person in front us is doing the best that she or he can.

Sexuality, simmering, and the B train back from the beach

By Stephen Snyder M.D. on December 07, 2010 in SexualityToday
A core sex therapy technique called "simmering" helps couples cultivate sexual arousal even when they don't have time or energy for sex.  For 21st Century couples in the age of the Blackberry, it's likely to be the simmering that keeps us together.

Does Blocking Your Social Networking Sites Make You Anti-Social?

By Tamara J Hicks Psy.D. on December 06, 2010 in The Digital Self
I am quite sure that the designers of Anti-Social Mac application did not intend to equate those who temporarily block out their friends and family with Charles Manson.

Social Movements Need Strong and Weak Ties

By Melinda Blau on December 05, 2010 in Consequential Strangers
Can the “weak ties” we forge and nourish via social media motivate us to put our lives on the line for a worthy cause?

Sibling Rivalry on NPR- Similarity -Sharks & Cain and Abel

By Cathy Cress M.S.W. on December 05, 2010 in Mom Loves You Best
Siblings fall into categories from best friends to murderous rivals .Brothers and sisters who fall in the Cain and Abel sibling category are called seething or irate and can often trace their contentious relationship to sibling rivalry.