Essential Reads

Do Dog Owners Make Better Lovers? Some Scientific Answers

Insights into the human-canine connection

Things Not to Say to a New Widow

Five phrases to avoid

To Date or Not to Date

Are you ready to meet someone new?

Putting Humanity and the Humanities Back Into Medicine

Treat the patient, not the lab test.

Recent Posts on Relationships

Is Your Childhood Wrecking Your Love Life?

By Peg Streep on July 21, 2015 in Tech Support
One of the legacies of childhood is how well or badly we connect to others, both in friendship as well as intimate settings. How your childhood experiences may shape your ability to love and be loved today, and how to understand and recognize patterns of insecure attachment.

Finding a Secure Base and Rewiring Your Personality

One way to change your insecure attachment style to that of having an “earned” secure style is to find and nurture your own secure base in adulthood. Learn what to look for and how to create for yourself the experiences that naturally instill mental health and well-being. It is never too late to rewire your personality in a way that works better for you and leads to more h

The Narcissism Test

By Craig Malkin PhD on July 21, 2015 in Romance Redux
The Narcissism Test -- What's Your Score?

How Society Could Accommodate Multi-Partner Marriages

Legalizing same-sex marriage has started people talking more seriously about the possibility of multiple-partner marriage. For some that means a slide down a slippery slop to absolute chaos, but it does not have to be that way. This blog looks at two alternative ways to structure multiple-partner marriage and explores some of the possible social impacts.

How to Deal With "Stop, I Don’t Want to Talk About It"

Is there an elephant in your room? Hidden agendas and passive-aggressive behavior can wreak havoc in any relationship.

What Do You Need to Thrive?

In 1954, psychologist Abraham Maslow created the famous “hierarchy of needs.” The role of the self is front and center in Maslow’s model and goes hand in hand with other leading theories in psychology that emphasize the individual. The focus is primarily on the self, not the social. Maslow’s step-by-step model misses the mark...

"Do I Sound Gay?"

Why would a gay man dislike “sounding gay?” Why would “sounding less like a man” make a gay man view himself as inferior, unattractive, and undesirable? Why does "passing" as straight make a gay man feel good? Read on as we explore Internalized Homophobia - a very real but largely unseen, unheard, and unspoken psychological struggle that is experienced by many gay men.

The Deafening Silence of Passive Aggressive Behavior

Has a relative, colleague, or friend ever gifted you with a passive aggressive present or backhanded compliment as their way of trying to prove a point or express their hostility wordlessly?

Is Social Media Harmful to Relationships? The Debate

By Martin Graff Ph.D. on July 20, 2015 in Love, Digitally
Do you argue with your partner as a result of Facebook use?

Tribes Always Triumph

By Paddy Steinfort on July 19, 2015 in Quick Wins
In adversity, tribes support each other in many ways - some of which research has shown increase willpower and resilience

Sexually Open Marraige

By Frances Cohen Praver Ph.D. on July 19, 2015 in Love Doc
“I’m not feeling well. I can’t get going.” Sharon said softly. I remarked, “You seem sad.” Her voice picked up as she said “I am but I don’t understand it. My life is great. I’m married to this wonderful man, have an adorable six year old daughter, a lovely home, and a satisfying career.”

The Espy Award

I was disgusted after reading so many ignorant and hateful comments on social media towards Caitlyn Jenner specifically, and transgender people generally. I learned that many people were really upset that Caitlyn Jenner won the Arthur Ashe Courage Award, particularly over Lauren Hill, who was a college basketball player who died a few months ago of brain cancer.

A Love Note to Pluto

By Marlynn Wei M.D., J.D. on July 18, 2015 in Urban Survival
NASA's New Horizons spacecraft flyby mission has shown us amazing photos of Pluto. What can this rare glimpse of this dwarf planet billions of miles away teach us?

The Only Excuse You’ll Ever Need (or Should Ever Use)

When there’s something you’d rather not do, or wish you hadn’t done, an excuse might seem like the only graceful remedy. This simple guideline to making that excuse work will help you figure out how to make the best of that bad situation.

Backing Away From Lovers' Leap

The heartfelt sense that we've met some long lost part of ourselves in that new friend with whom we so readily, easily, and fluidly fell into what seemed like the rare moment of intimacy within which we can share our "darkest" and "deepest" is irrelationship all dressed up to look, once again, like the cure to our disconnected state.

3 Reasons We Can't Make Up Our Minds

Indecisive? Some causes and tips for learning to be bold.

Ben Affleck: Can You Forgive a Betrayer?

By Jane Greer Ph.D. on July 16, 2015 in Shrink Wrap
Can your partner change?

Mom Loved You Best! The Rise and Fall of Sibling Rivalry

When and why did you experience sibling rivalry? With hindsight, what do you know now that you didn't understand then that makes the rivalry vanish?

Negotiating Your True Worth

By Billi Gordon Ph.D. on July 16, 2015 in Obesely Speaking
Understanding what you are versus who you are in a world that understands neither.

Steps to Heal Sex Addiction: The Building Blocks of Intimacy

What's needed is an understanding of the building blocks of intimacy, which when worked on individually and as a whole, will gradually allow the addict to learn a new style of relating to others.

Top 5 Signs That Women Are Converging With Men

By Nigel Barber Ph.D. on July 16, 2015 in The Human Beast
Fairly rigid gender divisions of the past are giving way to a much more equal relationship. Women are begin to act, and feel more like men even as men's actions and sensibilities are converging with women What are the unmistakable signs that women are becoming more like men?

10 Steps to Restoring Trust in Relationships

Time to stop recycling old patterns of behaviors that keep you stuck in unsatisfying relationships.

How Do You Really Know If You're Falling in Love?

Are you falling in love, or is this just a passing attraction?

A Debate: Is Marriage Worth It?

By Marty Nemko Ph.D. on July 16, 2015 in How To Do Life
These pros and cons may help you decide.

My Absent Mother Wants to Be My Mother Now

What To Do When Your Mother Re-enters Your Life

10 Ways the Children of Single Parents Defy All Stereotypes

By Bella DePaulo Ph.D. on July 15, 2015 in Living Single
Here are 10 stereotype-defying scientifically-based facts about the children of single parents. Sometimes they do even better than the children of married parents. How is that possible?

Looking in the Cultural Mirror at 100, The Top 10

Five years ago I began writing pieces for Looking in the Cultural Mirror. While psychology may define itself as the science of behavior, when it comes to people it often seems more like the science of American behavior than of human behavior everywhere. This, my 100th piece, discusses the blog’s background and aims. It offers links to most popular 10.

When Your "Inner Child" Hijacks Your Adult Relationships

When “little you” goes unchecked, destructive relationship dynamics can wreak havoc on your adult life. Here are 4 examples of dysfunctional inner child patterns and how to better access the ‘adult you.’

What We Are Talking About When We Talk About Masculinity

By Rick Miller LICSW on July 15, 2015 in Unwrapped
The "new masculinity" includes strengthening a whole new set of muscles.