Essential Reads

How to Put Yourself in Someone Else’s Shoes

Empathy works by analogy, mirror neurons, or embodied simulation.

8 Secret Body Language Cues That Can Control Your Behavior

How others can trigger your senses and emotions.

When Adults Struggle With Their Relationships

At holidays, the focus is on family - some siblings do not get along though

Why Are So Many Indian Arranged Marriages Successful?

The upsides of relinquishing choice, deciding quickly, & lower expectations

Recent Posts on Relationships

Could New Facebook Features Help You Get Over Your Ex?

Facebook may soon be helping you manage your relationship with your ex by allowing you to limit how much of them you see in your news feed without unfriending or blocking them. Research on coping with break-ups suggests that Facebook has the right idea about how to deal with your ex.

Loneliness: Perceived Social Isolation Is Public Enemy No. 1

For the first time, a new study has identified how "perceived social isolation" triggers fight-or-flight stress responses that can lead to illness and premature death.

I’m Getting Married, Should I Change My Name?

What to consider if you’re uncertain about marital name change. This choice can have many different meanings.

Jane Austen Understood Deception and Discovery in Love

Jane Austen knew a secret or two about the problems with ambiguity in romance and love. Her most beloved novels hinge on a female character's misunderstandings on which man is the best for her, until time and circumstances reveal the truth.

Child Rearing: Boundaries and Love

At a certain point during breastfeeding, it is natural for the baby to bite the breast. This is one of many important avenues for mother and baby to negotiate their boundaries—between self and other. All of child rearing revolves around boundaries and love.

5 Things They Don't Tell You About Grief

Worried you aren't grieving the "right" way? There are some parts of the grief process that people don't like to talk about.

We Need a National Anti-Loneliness Campaign for the Holidays

By Guy Winch Ph.D. on November 23, 2015 The Squeaky Wheel
The holidays can be an acutely lonely period for millions of people. Here's what you can do about it:

Happy Holidays—Or Else!

Being haunted by the idea that other people are “better” at holiday celebrations than we are can drive us to “fix” our own family’s time together. But this preoccupation with “getting it right” can become an emotional wedge between ourselves and those we’re trying to please.

The 6 Things We All Need to Be Thankful For

From an evolutionary perspective, gratitude is a significant social emotion. It drives us to connect with others - and it works to remind us of the fact that we are always part of something larger than ourselves. Here is a list of 6 things to be grateful for this Thanksgiving (and all other days of the year as well).

Can't I Just Say "I'm Sorry" and We Can Move On?

The question is not if we will hurt others, because we all will. The question is what we should do when it happens.

Will Your Child Be Part of the Collateral Damage of Divorce?

Rather than looking at the negative consequences of divorce as fixed, we need to examine the origins of the problem – the so-called pathogenesis – to recognize that these consequences are the results of symptoms acquired over the course of a child’s lifetime.

My Husband Is an Ineffective Father

"I can't take it anymore. I want to walk away."

The Dirty Little (Sex) Secret of Therapy

By Marty Klein PhD on November 22, 2015 Sexual Intelligence
Patients should be safe assuming that therapists understand sex as it actually is, don't believe discredited myths, and can discuss anything.

Being Your Own Therapist

Being a good therapist to yourself means balancing tough love and soft love, brutal honesty with careful consideration.

You Said You Love Me; So Why Do You Yell At Me?

Do intimate partners really just blow up at each other "out of the blue"? Read on to learn what really causes loving partners to "lose control" of their emotions.

Beauty and Fear: Thanksgiving From a Different Perspective

The act of giving can be enhanced when you give from a cup that runneth over, from knowing the true nature of inner beauty. Looking at Thanksgiving from a different perspective.

7 Tips to Create Healthy Boundaries with Others

By Abigail Brenner M.D. on November 21, 2015 In Flux
Healthy boundaries help you form and maintain healthy relationships. Knowing what you need, what personal space is yours helps to to prevent unwanted overtures and violations of what you consider personally sacred.

Lessons From the Paris Attacks

In the words of the next door neighbor of the ax-murderer, “But he . . . (say it with me) seemed like such a nice guy!” Why did she have that impression? Because her neighbor, whom she knew nothing about, had become familiar.

3 Things to Do When You're Not Sure About Your Relationship

Ambivalence is common in long-term relationships because it’s easy to drift apart over the years, but you stay because leaving is too complicated. And yet ambivalence is a stressful place to park. Is your marriage really worth saving? Here are some reasons to set yourself free from indecision and tips for moving toward a more peaceful, fulfilling existence.

Lifting the Covers: Sex with the Undercover Police

Has reporting over-simplified the predicament of undercover agents and their relationships?

The Uneven Distribution of Violence and News

Which violence counts? It is as if the entire world is complicit in some unconscious belief that violence in some parts of the world is unavoidable, part of life, and therefore not important, and only some parts of the world, those that have managed to export violence elsewhere, those are the parts of the world about whose rare acts of violence news media speak.

Should You Boycott Holiday Baking?

Are you already stressed about the weight you'll gain over the holidays? Here's a simple tip that will go a long way: Stop baking. Say no to anything that involves bringing or exchanging sweet treats. Trust me, you'll thank me later.

Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence: Can we break the cycle?

Like Water: Why We Attract Who We Attract

If you want to know what needs work, look at your choices of mates. The answer will surprise you.

What Kind of Romantic Partners Make Narcissists Happy?

Narcissists attach more importance to the physical attractiveness and status of potential mates than to whether or not their mate is a warm and caring person. But are narcissists really happier when they find that trophy partner? New research suggests that the answer is yes.

Our Hidden Fear of Acceptance

While the fear of rejection is understandable, the fear of acceptance is less visible. The article explores how this more subtle fear operates. Being mindful of how we fear acceptance can open to door to a deeper capacity to receive the love and caring that is available.

Less Me More We

Happiness is not a solo enterprise and wellbeing doesn’t occur in a vacuum. We are social creatures and our wellbeing—both physical and mental—depends on our connections.

The Healing Power of Gratitude

Science shows that gratitude is good for us both mentally and physically. As we aim to cultivate more gratitude, there are two questions to consider: what barriers do we face in feeling grateful in our daily lives, and how can we connect more fully to our feelings of appreciation?

Who is "A Mensch"?

You've surely heard or read the word "Mensch," which is a Yiddish-derived term reserved for a special human being, who is recognized by others to represent decency, honest and kindness, among other admirable qualities.