Relationships Essential Reads

7 Ways to Combat Facebook Jealousy

By Andrea Bonior Ph.D. on March 31, 2015 in Friendship 2.0
Many of us are trapped in a cycle of seeking out social media almost automatically when we're bored or stressed. Sometimes, though, it can do more harm than good—especially if it spurs on jealousy. Here are seven ways to break free.

It's Time to Take the "Positive" Out of Positive Psychology

By Amie M. Gordon PhD on March 30, 2015 in Between You and Me
What is the prescription for optimal living? The burgeoning field of positive psychology appears to have many of the answers: We should be kind to others, forgiving of transgressions, gracious and compassionate in our daily lives, and optimistic about the future. Following this simple plan should keep us happy and healthy. It turns out the answer might not be so simple.

Getting to Yes with Yourself

By Aldo Civico Ph.D. on March 30, 2015 in Turning Point
In his latest book, William Ury, one of the world's best-known experts on negotiation, shows us how we can understand and influence ourselves first, before we engage in difficult conversations and negotiations with others--thus improving our chances for a successful agreement.

The Benefits of Embracing the Ordinary

By Amie M. Gordon PhD on March 27, 2015 in Between You and Me
What would you rather do, write down the last conversation you had or watch a funny video? This is one question researchers asked in an effort to understand whether we underestimate the pleasure we get from recalling mundane events from our past. We don't want to record the last conversation we had, but in a month, we'd rather read about it than watch a funny video.

Departing Earth

By Kenneth Worthy Ph.D. on March 26, 2015 in The Green Mind
Scientists, engineers, and science fiction writers have long imagined leaving Earth to colonize space, but now a budding company is accepting volunteers to become astronauts on a one-way trip to Mars. Is this just the first wave of permanent departures from our home planet—a long exodus in which forsake our precious Earth?

Sex in the Head

What is sexual desire? Is it raw, animal instinct? Or is it something more mindful?

Obama and Netanyahu in Family Therapy

After the initial evaluation and assessment, the therapist identified three classic family dysfunctions that exist in the relationship between Barack and Bibi: enmeshment, triangulation, and emotional cut-offs.

One Key to a Good Marriage

By Michael W Austin on March 25, 2015 in Ethics for Everyone
For a good marriage, focus on being the right person.

Should You Make Choices for Your Kids?

Parents need to be concerned about the choices their kids make. The quality of your presence and support as your child explores and sorts through the options establishes the basis for his and her confident and solid decision-making when he and she are on their own.

Eight Ways to Protect Your Marriage from Divorce

Married and want to stay that way? You can do a lot to impact your odds of lasting love. While the odds of divorce remain high, there's nothing that says you have to become a statistic. Check in here for strategies you can use n what you can do to make that difference.

The Tolerable Distance of Closeness

Being physically close to your lover is central to romantic love. Indeed, temporal and geographical closeness typically increases emotional closeness, and this often makes distance seem intolerable. Some kind of distance, however, must remain even between two lovers. What is the nature of such distance, and is it indeed intolerable?

Do As I Say: Be Oppositional!

Oppositional behavior by children would seem to run counter to arguments in my previous posts that family members often do what they think their families want them to, even at great personal sacrifice. But oppositionality can be more apparent than real. People often act that way to accomodate what they perceive their parents to want and need from them.

The Bourgeois Revolution

By Steven Mintz Ph.D. on March 23, 2015 in The Prime of Life
Many of our most powerful fantasies and expectations about marriage and family life emerged two centuries ago.

10 Things Your Psychology Professors Want You to Know

An education in psychology is enormous - including information on such diverse topics ranging from how infants perceive shapes to how rats learn to complete mazes - and more. Way more. The list found here distills a traditional education in psychology to 10 things that psychology professors really want their students to walk away with.

Science and the Online Dating Profile

Online dating is the new singles bar, one in which your words won't be drowned out by the music. But which words should you use? There is some scientific evidence about relatively more effective ways to turn an online contact into a real huggable moment.

Yes, You Can Raise Happy Children After Divorce

By Wendy Paris on March 17, 2015 in Splitopia
Intuitively, we feel that children should be raised by two married parents living together. But an avalanche of studies over the past 40 years shows that this isn’t what they need. Research shows that about 80-percent of children of divorce adapt well and see no lasting negative effects on their grades, social adjustment, or mental health. So what do kids need?

Why the Story of Cinderella Still Enchants

By Peg Streep on March 17, 2015 in Tech Support
Does the world really need another Cinderella movie? Well, maybe it does. A look at what fairy tales teach us and our children.

Women Like Men With Big Medals

By Gregg Murray Ph.D. on March 15, 2015 in Caveman Politics
If our basic drive is to survive and reproduce, why do men, who have been the primary war fighters throughout human history, volunteer to subject themselves to the life-threatening dangers of war?

6 Reasons that Women Fake It During Sex

A woman’s faking an orgasm during sex with a man appears to be a fairly common occurrence. New research reveals that these 6 reasons are behind women’s tendencies to be fake during their most intimate moments.

Are You Having Enough Sex?

As a psychotherapist specializing in sexual and intimacy disorders, I can tell you that for a lot of individuals and couples the amount of sex they’re having (or not having) can be worrisome.

What's Wrong With Giving Advice

By Aldo Civico Ph.D. on March 13, 2015 in Turning Point
We might think that giving advice might be the best way to help someone who has a problem. But it might instead inhibit our interpersonal relations, and be very ineffective. Here is why.

The 'Other' Marshmallow Test

The tower building exercise - and its marshmallow - reveals another secret of successful human behavior, in this case for mental health professionals: when we put the goals of our patients first and foremost, they are going to be more effective, and so will we.

On "Falling in Love" vs "Loving"

By Christopher Ryan on March 12, 2015 in Sex at Dawn
Does "falling in love" prevent us from actually loving?

Why We Need People Who Care About Us

Empathy erosion occurs when people fail to attend to the humanity—the feelings, interests, kinship, etc—of others. Either they don’t cognitively understand others’ feelings or they aren’t emotionally affected by others’ feelings.

The Borderline Father

Women are more likely to have Borderline Personality Disorder, but men can be impacted as well. Here's how a Borderline father can affect you and some tips about what you can do about it.

How Much Is Too Much to Share on Social Media?

We often talk about the problem of “oversharing” on social media. But what’s the difference between sharing and oversharing? Where do we draw the line, and how does what we share on social media affect how other people see us? Here are 5 research-backed tips about what we should, and shouldn't, be sharing on Facebook.

The Brave New World of Connectional Intelligence

By Tim Leberecht on March 09, 2015 in The Romance of Work
Connectional intelligence highlights an evolution that has been quietly taking place across workplaces all over the world—just like traditional intelligence is “out,” so is the old way of working. It’s a whole new world in more ways than one; there’s less emphasis on conventional hierarchies, more on reshaping office environments and workdays for improved collaboration.

Falling Out of Love

By Romeo Vitelli Ph.D. on March 09, 2015 in Media Spotlight
Though there has been extensive research looking at the psychology of romantic love, is it possible to learn what can cause people to fall out of love with their significant other? For that matter, how is it possible to move on after a relationship comes to an end? A new article published in Review of General Psychology raises some intriguing questions about this.

Is Marriage in Decline?

By Steven Mintz Ph.D. on March 07, 2015 in The Prime of Life
Why the marriage rate is falling worldwide.

The Surprising Upside of Guilt and Shame

By Guy Winch Ph.D. on March 07, 2015 in The Squeaky Wheel
Guilt and shame are extremely unpleasant emotions that can cause deep psychological wounds and impact our lives in significant ways--but might they also have an upside?