Essential Reads

How to Neutralize Your Partner’s Defenses

By Leon F Seltzer Ph.D. on November 15, 2017 in Evolution of the Self
Unlike courtship, once couples enter into a presumably lasting commitment, they both—however unconsciously—focus more on what they never really liked about each other.

Starved for Affection: How Childhood Experiences Define Love

By Peg Streep on November 07, 2017 in Tech Support
The culture tells us to stop whining about childhood and to "move on." But we'll keep repeating the patterns of the past if we can't see them.

Should We Prepare Ourselves for Straying?

By Aaron Ben-Zeév Ph.D. on October 31, 2017 in In the Name of Love
In order to reduce the pain of a potential romantic rejection, some people cultivate back-up romantic options. How beneficial is this preemptive strike strategy?
Microsoft images

Are You Lonely in Your Marriage?

Emotional abandonment happens when the other person is lying right beside us.

More Posts on Attachment

I’m in a Sexless Marriage

By Sam Louie MA, LMHC on August 31, 2017 in Minority Report
What does it mean when you're in a sexless marriage or relationship? Is something wrong with the relationship and is there any hope?

I Still Don't Feel Loved/Connected/Cared About!

One of the biggest issues to plague couples I see in my practice is the tension between what is happening and what is wanted. How do we turn this into an opportunity for intimacy?

Dogs as Healers, Dogs as Co-Therapists for PTSD

How Dogs Can Facilitate the Healing of Trauma.

What Your Earliest Food Memories Say About You

Memories of food associated with growing up influence you in ways you never realized. New research shows the role that food memory plays in adapting to adult life.
Ryan McGuire/Gratisography

A Sacred Circle (Writing Group-2)

By Elizabeth Young on August 17, 2017 in Adaptations
Everyone took her neighbors' hands and the circle steadied and tightened: we created and held that sacred space.

How Do We Decide Whether or Not to Break Up?

By Grant H. Brenner M.D. on August 07, 2017 in ExperiMentations
What factors do we weigh when deciding to leave a long-term relationship? How does attachment style influence decision-making? New research provides additional insight.

How to Recover From a Narcissistic Parent

The effects of emotional neglect by narcissistic parents are particularly pernicious and difficult to acknowledge, let alone overcome.

Considerations on "The Big Sick"

By Roberta Satow Ph.D. on August 05, 2017 in Life After 50
Does Kumail Nanjiani's relationship with his parents ring bells for you?

Are Dog-Loving Millennials Driving House Prices Up?

More millennials are listing dogs as the biggest factor in their home buying decisions, ahead of marriage and children.

Plato, Phones, and That Embarrassing Silence

Is technology a problem? Was it in the past?

How to Recognize Toxic Individuals and Toxic Relationships

Have you ever questioned if you are in a toxic friendship or toxic romantic relationship? Do you feel beaten down by individuals who say they care about you? Learn the red flags!
whiteboxmedia / 123RF Stock Photo

What Does Your Social Media Style Say About You?

By F. Diane Barth L.C.S.W. on July 30, 2017 in Off the Couch
Research released this month suggests that every time you post to social media you may be revealing more about yourself than you realize.

From Friendship to Courtship: How Friends Fall in Love

How do couples transition from friendship to courtship? The answer depends on projection and mutual attraction.

Can Technology Make Us More Human?

By David W. Johnson Ed.D. on July 28, 2017 in Constructive Controversy
Do the advances in social media, artificial intelligence, robotics, and other technology threaten our basic nature as humans, or will technology enhance our humanness?

Zeus or Sisyphus?: A Tale of Couples Therapy

By Marty Babits on July 27, 2017 in The Middle Ground
With Zeus wielding power to create anything and Sisyphus, trapped in eternal futility, how can a couples therapist help break this deadlock?
Courtesy of Pexels

How to Avoid Sabotaging Your Relationship

Romantic relationships are bound to bring out our deepest insecurities which can lead to self-sabotaging behaviors. Here are some ways to avoid sabotaging a good relationship.

Loneliness and Dis-Connection

Do you pick up your phone t look at the various iterations of Facebook and Twitter when you are with others or feeling somehow lonely? This strategy will only make you more lonely.

Pornography and Broken Relationships

People who view pornography are much more likely to experience a romantic relationship breakup. We look at research data supporting this expectation and discuss pivotal factors.

Humans Defeat Nature—As Prescribed. Now What?

By Darcia Narvaez Ph.D. on July 16, 2017 in Moral Landscapes
Sigmund Freud encouraged aggression against Nature, along with other Western scholars. We’ve now reached “biological annihilation” of species all over the earth. Are you happy?

Baby Care: 3 Rs for Raising A Happy Child

By Darcia Narvaez Ph.D. on July 09, 2017 in Moral Landscapes
Depression is epidemic and even touches babies. How do early life's 3 Rs: recognition, resonance, and respect, mitigate against depression--for all of us?

Adult Siblings

By Roberta Satow Ph.D. on July 08, 2017 in Life After 50
Are there opportunities for adult siblings to understand and work out unresolved issues that are lurking from childhood?

How Strong Is Children's Attachment to Their Pets?

By Zazie Todd Ph.D. on July 07, 2017 in Fellow Creatures
The friendship and caring behaviors children show toward their pet are linked to attachment to the pet.

Unimagined Sensitivities, Part 9

By Michael Jawer on July 05, 2017 in Feeling Too Much
The deeply felt nature of people-pet relations often manifests in anomalous reports. This may reflect the way other animals apprehend feelings and their emotional bond with people.

Your Personal Independence Day

It's Independence Day! Time to declare your own freedom from (psychological) bondage

Five Ways Mindfulness Makes Your Relationship Happier

We all want happier relationships, but few of us know the keys to relationship satisfaction. Mindfulness may hold the answer!

Some Thoughts on Independence

For many of us, being dependent on others for comfort, support, and security gives us the ability to be independent.

Cell Phones and Relationship Distress: The Missing Link

Cell phone use and texting can lead to relationship dissatisfaction. New research elucidates why some relationships are more vulnerable than others.

Feeling Understood — Even More Important Than Feeling Loved?

Absent the substantial chemical attraction intrinsic to the heated glow of romantic love, can you actually stay in love with someone who you feel can’t “get” who you are?

What’s Normal?

By Kathryn Seifert Ph.D. on June 27, 2017 in Stop The Cycle
When it comes to childhood aggression, what is normal and what is not? When does behavior cross the line from anger to aggression?

First Date

By Dianne Grande Ph.D. on June 19, 2017 in In It Together
Are you missing the important signs of a match on first dates? Here are some characteristics of a healthy, happy match.