I’m Retired. Now What?

Retirement can be exciting and daunting; usually, it’s a bit of both. This is a unique time in life marked by shifts in roles and priorities. Yet in the media, we often see two extremes: carefree retirees traveling the world as a culmination of decades of work, or isolated older adults deteriorating at home as they face loneliness, estrangement, or illness. These very different views imply that we are either going to be free from hardship and celebrate every day or become isolated without purpose. The reality, for most people, is much more nuanced than we are shown.

Clients have shared with me that they feel lucky to be able to retire but are deeply unsatisfied, lonely, and without direction. Those who retire voluntarily may be met with comments of envy for the freedom they now have, which may make them feel ungrateful about struggling with the transition. This was supposed to be the end goal, after all. Others may not have had a choice due to health conditions, caregiving duties, or other life circumstances out of their control. Regardless of how it arrived, people can experience grief for their life as they understand it. They grieve the identity given by earlier roles, the loss of workplace social opportunities, and the structure of a schedule, even one that could be overwhelming.

Retirement isn’t a single event but a process. People often go through multiple phases: pre-retirement, transition, and adaptation (Canadian Psychological Association, 2023; Mitchell, n.d.). Disappointment and dissatisfaction can arise in the second phase as people are figuring out what it means for them to be retired by rediscovering meaning and purpose in life.

Ways to Redefine Meaning in Retirement

• Contributing to others. If you are feeling a loss of purpose or increased loneliness, volunteering or taking on a part-time job can be fulfilling. Opportunities include formal programs, like the National Park Service or United Way, and local options such as helping out at food pantries, community kitchens, fundraisers, or companion programs to homebound older adults. Some people also find part-time work in charity stores (such as Goodwill), greeting customers, or assisting in offices, can be enjoyable. Reaching out to local businesses, hospitals, and community organizations can help you find opportunities that fit your interests and needs.

• Rediscovering old interests or pursuing new ones. With retirement come shifts in prioritization of time, which can allow for deep diving into interests that may have fallen by the wayside—or taking up new hobbies. This might look like you finally using those piles of crafting materials you bought on sale over the years and just hadn’t felt there was time to get to, starting your ever-growing to-be-read pile of books, or trying something you’ve always wanted to. You might also seek out clubs or social groups around a topic of interest. These can be found through libraries, word of mouth, religious groups, or websites such as Meetup. Retirement is the time to reimagine your life, and sometimes that means picking up a ukulele for the first time.

• Using your strengths. For some people, purpose involved sharing knowledge or mentoring others in work roles. Retirement allows for more time to flex your strengths by sharing knowledge and experiences with others. If you have an interest in spending more time with youth, it can be worth checking programs in your area, such as the Boys & Girls Club, organizations supporting families and children, religious communities, or the local YMCA. If you are interested in sharing specific knowledge and experiences, consider reaching out to businesses, organizations, or the local library to offer classes related to your special interest or expertise, such as guided painting classes. You have years of experience to draw from. Why not share what you’ve learned with others?

Meaning in our life doesn’t disappear because roles end; it shifts. However you decide to redefine your purpose, allow for trial and error. The goal is to learn about yourself at this phase in your life and live that life fully. If learning the ukulele doesn’t work out, there’s always the harmonica.