Why are so many people drawn to conspiracy theories in times of crisis?
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this is interesting. I've always found my sexual interest to be largely unchangeable - as in, I seem to have almost a sort of immunity to things that on a rational level weird me out, like various types of porn that are around, I see no reason to even watch in the first place other than to reinforce liking what I already do like.. LOL. Maybe my emotional mind has been inactivated by years of antidepressants or something.. I sometimes seem to be able to overly inhibit my own impulses to the point it becomes maddening when I feel surrounded by emotional numbnets... LOL.. getting back to the point, what the woman in that quote says, is actually also what seems to be my main turn-on in women. Not necessarily with that whole dominance aspect to it (though that is a large part of it), but just someone who wants what I want. ...So before anyone goes accusing men of being socialized to have rapist impulses, or something - which quite frankly I am tired of hearing, especially when I've had the frustration of having TOO MUCH impulse control to the point it's alienated me amongst my own species! - people need to recognize this difference because it is a very fundamental one! Rapists don't give too sh*ts what their victim wants or doesn't want, or is feeling or experiencing. Obviously... whereas men who are more of a sexually dominant type, assuming I'm a "normal" example of this - and incorporating other bits of Ogas' research into how straight men tend to find female arousal basically to be a trigger (or not) of their own - aren't really into submissive women in the sense of having absolutely no active role in anything. (This seems to conflate submissiveness with passivity.) Women who tend towards submissiveness but who clearly show desire for/enjoyment of the experience.. I dunno, that seems to be the ideal for me.. to put it rather mildly ;)
wonder how many men would agree.
Also, something I've not yet seen mentioned on this site, at all really, but also wonder about myself and about sexuality in general (for women as well) is that there is so much contrast between "visual" and "emotional" arousal cues... where do verbal cues fit into this? I think that's something that's a pretty big one for both men and women, and probably regardless of sexual preference.. does it qualify as a visual cue because maybe mentally, it translates to that, or is it a whole other category entirely? I think there is so much attention on the "men are visual" thing that verbal cues (or maybe you'd call them auditory, but I'm talking about in written form as well)tend to be overlooked lately. Which might give women an impression that men can ONLY be turned on visually, or give men an impression that women need a romance/erotica novel scenario to get off? (both of which I don't think are plausible claims...) lol....
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