Perhaps denial is one true form of relatability. In other words, maybe you are witnessing these characteristics in others that you can identify with, but you are struggling to uphold your own ego.
This inner conflict between instinct and intellect seems to cause more friction with people who generally are more aware and introspective.
I recognize and relate to your story, you see, because there must be that aforementioned familiarity I'm aware of (at least semi-consciously) within me as well. We are all vulnerable to our own self-absorption, some more than others.

Something to keep in mind. People tend to accept things more easily once they better understand them. Tolerance nullifies ignorance. That said, people also fear what they don't understand. Getting to know yourself is a life-long journey, as we are constantly changing. Exploring shadow aspects of the self can take years or even a lifetime...

-peace