Values are what bring distinction to your life. You don't find them, you choose them. And when you do, you're on the path to fulfillment.
I am in the same situation. I am married for 10 years. My husband is from different culture and religion. We have gone through a lot due to me being a white and Muslim. Even they have tried to make him get married with a girl from the same culture and religion even though they did know that he is married to him. I do remember him going to his country just to please his mother in law and mother in law. The things became worse when I had my son. She did even blamed my own son about her arms being broken, she said my son was a bad sign. After a month of my son birth my brother dies unexpectedly and my family needed a little bit financial support which I did it immediately, that caused the biggest problem . She thought I am spending my husband's money. I yelled her that it was my money. I worked since I know myself how could she behaved the way. Years passed by every time they came to my house they dominated everything I had to bite my tongue, scream, fight etc. Every year 3-5 months with them. Last year I came to a point that I had to break down on the road, screaming my head off because of anger. My husband told me that he wont be calling them for a while then what happened? This year again they came to my house in August for staying until December. I told my husband this is no good and too long for me to stand them. Everything at the beginning was ok I was trying to change myself and avoid the conflicts etc. until my father in law did something blunder which embrassed our family in front everyone. When I was dealing with his behaviour, going through all the stress, my mother in law started to create a problem. her problem is I didn't talk with him, I didn't wear the dress she gave me on the religious function. She created drama for nearly 2 weeks not talking with anyone in my house, shouting at my husband as he is the enemy, pushing her way through to do whatever she wants. She even ignored my son not talking with him just passed by him without having any gesture or small talk. Yes everything is happened in my house, in my own house. Enough was enough I have asked my husband to buy their return ticket so they could go back to their country. I know he is sad and going through the stress because of the situation. I told him that I wont accept her bullying behaviour towards me and my son or even to him. I accepted everything what they have put me through, changing my name, pushing me to call themselves mother and father. I cannot take it anymore. I told them the person they had over the years died now, they cannot call me whatever they want, I wont call them mom and dad and they are not welcomed to my house whenever they want. Told them I wont tolerate the behaviours anymore they cannot behave as they want , they cannot make the things change at my own house. I am sad for my son because I lost my mom and dad very early and I have never had a chance to meet with my grandparents. But I think they deserve him. The relation cannot be on their terms, whenever they are happy with us they show love to my son if not then he is nothing to them.
I have an advise to everyone. Love cannot live long enough if there is no respect. From my experiences I have learned that the love is just an illusion. Please if you have a boyfriend whose family is like that , please, before it is too late run away. You will find love again, trust the universe or god or whatever you believe.
You are not born for them, you are not born to endure everything they put you through.
I am in difficult situation because after all since my husband thinks that this kind of things can happen in the family and I have to bear this. He says me Nobody's perfect so I have to calm down and accept.
If my son wouldn't be there I wouldn't even look back. I have to respect my son's emotions so I have to somehow handle this too. But I am so angry and broken ...
I pray to god that to give me strength, mind and some sense so that in future I wont turn like them. That is my pray.
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