I've had a pretty troubled sexual past, with partners that have been flirty and adventurous and fun... who then break up with me to talk pretty negatively about my penis to me directly, to their friends, and to our mutual friends, and often it's in bragging comparison of their new partner. It's been tremendously traumatic.

I've been with my wife for 11 years, married for nearly 4... and we basically never have sex. It almost all comes back to my and my issues with my past. It's literally been over a year since the last time we tried anything that even resembled sex (intercourse, oral, manual, etc.). She says she doesn't have a problem with my body, and she apparently enjoys intercourse with me just as much as the non-penis related aspects of sex... But I have a problem with my body, specifically my penis and how I've been humiliated for it... and you literally can't go anywhere in society without being reminded that, if people had their choice, nobody would prefer you over someone more endowed. And the lyrics of WAP are a golden example of this.

I'm all about giving oral and manual stimulation, and if "sex" for us was nothing more than me putting my hands and mouth on her body until the end of time, I would be okay with that... but she wouldn't be. She wants to be satisfied (which she says she is when we do have sex), but doesn't want to be in the spotlight every single time, which is how it would have to be in order for me to avoid these triggers and even remotely enjoy the experience.

I guess I just don't understand why Cardi B can't be proud of her body, proud of having rocking sex, and have that be the end of it? "If it don't hang, then he can't bang" has nothing to do about her body or her sexual openness, and it does nothing but make men feel inadequate about something they can't do anything about. The fact this is celebrated... sucks, especially when you don't fit society's expectations... and it sucks for my wife, because she'd rather have sex with me and my less than average sized penis over anyone else's, and she rarely gets to because I hate myself and the pressure society puts on something I can't do anything to change.