Is there just no end to these "porn ruins relationships" articles? I would have thought that Michael Castleman's recent 3-part article would put to bed all the nonsense and fallaciousness out there. To quote John Belushi,"But NOOoooo!"

You're right about one thing, Isadora; communication is the key to most problems/situations, but this communication needs to take place BEFORE people make the commitment of a long-term relationship. This needs to take place during the dating and continue into the marriage. If you don't discuss your true and total sexual needs/desires/fantasies early on, you're just ASKING for a train wreck down the line.

That being said, people DO have a right to their own personal, private sexual fantasies. What - are we going to call the Thought Police, now? As a licensed therapist, you should well know that many couples are fantasizing about something/someone else when they engage in couples sex. This is no big epiphany. Now....whether or not they choose to share that fantasy with their partner, that's another story.