It sounds like what you're living with your friend is incredibly painful and baffling. Creating some distance from your friend, for now, as heartbreaking as it may be, sounds like a wise and self-protective move. Sometimes we need to feel our compassion for others from a safe distance, and, focus more on compassion for ourselves. Perhaps, if it's possible, you can also remain open to a time in the future when things might be different and when, maybe, she will be able to own more of her own behavior. So too, I find it helpful to ask myself, what in all this can i use as a teacher? Is there a way that I can grow and evolve through and from this difficult process. Every situation is our teacher and viewed that way, even something awful like this can be welcomed with curiosity.
Warmest,
Nancy