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Susan Harrow
Susan Harrow

Kim Kardashian’s Style of Self Esteem Is Bad for Girls

I want girls to be proud of their bodies — but not as fodder for taking...

David Shankbone/WikimediaCommons
Source: David Shankbone/WikimediaCommons

Kim Kardashian is someone who is enraptured with her body. She appears to do nothing else except snap incessant selfies then post them to social media.

Her latest nude Instagram image got over 1.6 million likes and 302,000 comments.

One commenter wrote: You flaunt your curves, you show off your body and don't care what the haters have to say. You're a mom, and a lot of moms don't love their bodies so I applaud and bow down to you at the same time.

Another had the opposite opinion: I pray my kids don’t grow up to do what she has done with her body and past. Amen.”

I’m torn. I’m glad Kim Kardashian feels good about who she is, naked or not, but I do wonder, is this style of self-esteem really good for girls?

I think not.

I want girls to be proud of their bodies — but not as fodder for taking endless selfies, showing off their boobs and butt for others to admire.

I’d rather their confidence in their bodies be expressed in the privacy of their own bathroom. A place where they look in the mirror and say, “Thank you for all that you do for me. You are strong and solid and good and I’m grateful to you every day.” Like the nude yoga girl.

I want them to have the kind of self-esteem where they respond to a sext from a boy they barely know with, “No thanks, my body is private.”

When young girls look at Kim Kardashian’s naked photos I have to wonder if they are gaining less self-esteem instead of more. When they are bombarded all day long with the Kardashians and the Jenners, and anyone they consider a role model, including their friends is it possible to not compare?

Source: celebrityabc/flickr

Do they feel they don’t measure up because they aren’t wearing the latest lip gloss, glammy clothes, or sporting that sleek ponytail, all while on vacation on some super exclusive island, a gorgeous guy slathering said naked body with celebrity sunscreen — all the while making money, for, well, doing nothing.

I want girls to have the kind of self-esteem to be able to say, “No, Stop it!” when a guy grabs her boobs or even stares at them when she doesn’t welcome the attention.

I want girls to band together and say to each other, “You are enough. I love you just as you are.” No need do more, try harder, or amp it up.

I want girls to get self-esteem from not from nude selfies, but for helping make their neighborhoods and communities better, to join a cause that speaks to them, to help a classmate that others shun, to protect the weak from bullies, to speak out when they see wrongdoing, to show their siblings their secret shortcuts for avoiding misery and loneliness, to start grooving a path now that leads to a meaningful life.

I want to live in a world where mothers to show their daughters the way by loving themselves, stretch marks, sagging skin, muffin tops, flaws and all, every day, right now so they transmit that self-love from womb to tomb. If they don’t set an example, who will?

I want all of us to say to girls, your opinion of yourself is the only one that matters. You don’t need to be checking Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook posts to see if you measure up. Instead, follow your own internal compass, set it to true north and course correct every day. Snapchat that.

Susan Harrow is a top media coach, PR expert, black belt in Aikido, & author of Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul (HarperCollins) and True Shield: Verbal Self-Defense Training For Young Women & Teens. For 25 years she’s worked with clients like rock stars and celebrity chefs to CEOs of Fortune 500 companies, as well as entrepreneurs, authors, coaches, consultants, speakers, healers and socially conscious businesses. Dozens of her clients have been on Oprah, 60 Minutes, Good Morning America etc. She shows her clients and course participants how to double or triple their business with PR by using sound bites effectively.


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About the Author
Susan Harrow

Susan Harrow is the author of Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul.

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