Interview With "Dear Sugar" Cheryl Strayed

Tiny Beautiful Things is Cheryl Strayed’s first collection of her popular—and, for a while, anonymous—“Dear Sugar” advice columns for The Rumpus. “I remind people that they do not need permission to tell the truth about themselves," Cheryl explains, "to seek the peace and love they deserve, to create the lives they want. Most of us are more fearful and vulnerable and searching than we let on to being. We want to seem strong and aloof, but we all struggle. We all have doubts and weaknesses. In the columns, I write from a place of understanding and empathy, but I also challenge people to do better and love harder. I think the column has been successful because people long for that. Here’s more from this prolific author:

Jennifer Haupt: Why did you stay anonymous for so long?

CS: I didn’t have a plan about how long I’d stay anonymous. The whole “Dear Sugar” thing has been one big experiment. I knew from the beginning I’d someday reveal my identity. I’d never written anonymously so I wanted to give it a good long run before I stepped out from behind it. I wanted to see what it felt like to write from behind a mask. I think in the beginning being anonymous enhanced my ability to connect with readers and to build my credibility. Perhaps my anonymity forced people to base their opinions purely on my writing and the advice I gave, rather than on the assumptions they might make because of how I look or what else I’ve written. After the first year or so, I think the importance of Sugar’s anonymity fell away. By the time I revealed my identity, I was deeply relieved to do so.

JH: How did you choose which letters to include in Tiny Beautiful Things?

CS: Tiny Beautiful Things exists because so many readers emailed me to ask me to collect my columns in a book, so I chose many of the reader favorites. I was also mindful about addressing a range of subjects. There are columns in the book about love, loss, money, sex and many other things. There are letters from women and men, young and old, gay and straight. I wanted the book to reflect the diversity of the “Dear Sugar” column.

JH: You’ve written memoir, fiction, nonfiction… pretty much everything! Do you have a preference?

CS: I love both fiction and memoir equally and I think I’ll always write both. With Tiny Beautiful Things, I’ve also become a self-help author, which delights me to no end. I never thought I’d write self-help. I’m invigorated when my writing guides me in new directions.

JH: Is there something people may be surprised to learn about your writing life?

CS: I don’t have an office—or at least not one that doesn’t also serve as the TV room and family den and a closest for my husband’s wardrobe. I write in various chairs in my house, but usually in my bedroom. My papers and manuscripts are stacked here and there rather than stored in any organized fashion. My goal for 2013 is to finally take Virginia Woolf’s advice and get a room of my own.

JH: Are fiction and nonfiction two different parts of the brain for you? Do you use different techniques to access each one?

CS: I wouldn’t say they are different parts of the brain. Writing feels like writing to me. It’s hard. It’s fun. It’s equal parts discipline, craft, intuition and magic, regardless of genre.

JH: What is the One True Thing you learned from being Dear Sugar?

CS: That the body knows. When your heart sinks. When you feel sick to your gut. When something blossoms in your chest. When your brain gloriously pops. That’s your body telling you the One True Thing. Listen to it.

JH: What’s next for you?

CS: I’m traveling around the country talking about Tiny Beautiful Things and Wild for the next few months. After that I’m taking a very long vacation with my family in a place so far away my cell phone will be utterly useless.

Cheryl Strayed is the author of Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar and the novel Torch. Her stories and essays have appeared in numerous magazines and journals, including The New York Times Magazine, The Washington Post Magazine, Vogue, The Rumpus, Self, The Missouri Review, The Sun, and The Best American Essays. She lives in Portland, Oregon.