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Fighting Your Weaknesses

Quick tips for ameliorating 10 common inhibitors of success

Pixabay, CC0 Public Domain
Source: Pixabay, CC0 Public Domain

Conventional wisdom says, “Build on your strengths.” And I agree, but some common weaknesses usually must at least be mitigated or you may not get a chance to use your strengths.

Of course, most weaknesses don’t succumb to quick tips but my current thinking on behavior change is that quick tips end up yielding more net good than do protracted prescriptions. Quick tips are particularly likely to yield more net good per-minute of reader time. There are plenty of long articles and books on each of the following but perhaps these quick tips add something to the corpus. With that as underpinning:

Lack of drive/procrastination

Baby steps?

Picture the benefit to you and to others?

Pair up with a driven person who lacks something you bring to the table, perhaps calm, detail-orientedness, people skills? It’s no shame to want to work with people with complementary strengths.

Lack of intelligence

Find easier work?

Pair up with a smarter person who might value what you bring?

Lack of emotional intelligence

Should you live by this mantra: Make people feel good about themselves unless you have good reason not to?

Monitor people’s non-verbal reactions to you: sighing, pursed lips, disagreeing gratuitously?

Ask for feedback from trusted people?

Lack of technical chops. Courses usually are time-ineffective because the content and pace rarely are well-enough matched to your needs. Best is self-study perhaps augmented by a tutor or study partner.

Unprepossessing looks. Even conventionally unattractive, overweight people can look much better or worse depending on clothes, makeup and posture.

Is it time for a clothes or makeup makeover?

To stand straighter?

Smile more—not a pasted smile but one based on trying to find the good in others and in the world?

Public speaking. Key is to, guided by a brief outline, act as though you’re having a conversation. Deviate from conversational tone only to slow down if you tend to speak quickly and to vary volume and pace if you tend to be monotonic. Trying to recite a scripted speech almost guarantees failure, diminished sense of authenticity, and certainly boring your audience.

Disorganization

Start by cleaning one small area at a time: Your desktop? One corner of a room?

To keep your activities straight, use one simple system, for example, writing your immediate to-dos on a memo cube and longer-term ones on a calendar (Outlook, Google Calendar ,or a week-at-a-glance paper engagement book.)

Fear of failure. Sometimes that fear is to be honored: when the task truly is too hard or there’s a better use of your time. But more often, it’s wiser to risk failure. Is it worth facing possible rejections knowing you guarantee failure by not trying?

Substance abuse. For you, is the right answer cutting back? Going cold turkey? With help from family? A professional? Or have you concluded that for now at least, the benefits of the substance outweigh the liabilities?

Fatigue. Would it help to have a sleep ritual such as: exercise one to three hours before bedtime, keep the bedroom cool, do the same pre-bed activities each night, and if you’re having trouble clearing your mind, saying a mantra or even, yes, counting sheep?

Dr. Nemko’s nine books are available. You can reach career and personal coach Marty Nemko at mnemko@comcast.net.

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