Five Questions to Help You to Let Go

Take a page from nature’s book on living and blooming.

Posted Nov 08, 2019

The trees are about to show you how beautiful it is to let things go. Maybe where you are, they’ve already started. This is one of my favourite things about the autumn season.

Photo by Autumn Mott Rodeheaver on Unsplash
Source: Photo by Autumn Mott Rodeheaver on Unsplash

Every day, as I walk into nature, I see change. Old colours turn into new ones. Lush, leafy views change into bare, stalky ones. The temperature cools and the light changes. The morning mist is mysterious and the little light we see magical. There is a total shift in energy as nature shows us how easy and beautiful it can be to let go. It’s magnificent. In fact, it’s essential.

If old leaves wouldn’t let go of their trees, new leaves could not be born. If nature would not know how to let go, it would grow old, weary and weak with all its weight. Fortunately, it knows and it knows to do it gracefully. Because of that, every year, nature grows stronger, more flourishing and more stunning than before.

Now imagine if you as a human could do the same. Imagine if you could let go of the things that weigh you down. Imagine if you could release whatever is holding you back. You could forget about your past mistakes. You could stop doing things that no longer served you.

You could take a page from nature’s book and learn to listen to the seasons that surround you. You can learn to use autumn as an opportunity to cleanse, purge and declutter your life – physically, mentally and spiritually. You can create a version of autumn in your being.

Start by identifying something that you've been thinking about letting go. It could be a habit, a thought, a limiting belief, a dream you no longer want to strive for, a person who brings you down, an item on your to-do list, an activity, or even a job. Really, anything goes. The only rule is that it is something that you have the power to let go of.

Once you've identified it, ask yourself whether it does any one or more of these things:

1. Does it drain you?

If you're finding yourself feeling low in energy after doing this activity, seeing this person or thinking this thought, chances are it's not healthy for you. Since it's draining your energy, it's also making it harder for you to have the energy to do the things that actually lift you higher.

2. Does it bring you down?

It could also be that you find your mood changing whenever you experience this thing. You might go into it already dreading it but it's especially after it that you feel quite melancholic and low. This is another sign that what is going on isn't right for you.

3. Does it make you feel bad?

"Bad" is ambiguous on purpose. It could be it makes you feel angry, less than worthy or like you're doing something that simply doesn't sit well with you. Worse yet, you're wasting time doing something that makes you feel bad when instead you could be spending that time doing something that makes you feel good.

4. Does it hold you back from moving forward?

Sometimes you do things simply because they're familiar, because you've always done them, or because you don't know anything else. However, none of these reasons are good enough to keep doing them. In fact, they're probably holding you back from moving forward, growing and progressing to something bigger and better.

5. Does it send you in a direction you don't want to go?

This should send some big alarm bells off. If you're doing something that's sending you onto the wrong path, you should stop immediately. Everything you do should be done with a clear purpose and meaning. Every action, person, and thought should align with the life you want to live and the future you want to experience.

Now that you've thought about these questions and answered them honestly, it's time for some tough love. If the "thing" (be it whatever it is) that you're thinking about does any one or more of these, it's time to seriously start thinking about letting it go.

Take a moment to imagine the moment that you do. You no longer feel or carry its weight and as a result, are able to stand up taller. You feel less drained and hence have more energy, motivation and inspiration to do things that light you higher. You actually find that you're doing less yet you're doing more of the right things. This is what living a simpler life more fully looks and feels like.

You feel lighter, stronger and better because you don't waste your energy on anything that doesn't serve you. Your mind is more focused because non-important matters no longer distract you. You're simply doing the things that feel right for you.

So, if your "thing" matches any of those questions, and you know you've got to start letting it go, start with this one simple step.

What is the easiest, tiniest step you can take to start letting it go?

That's it. Start small and simple. And then repeat. Again and again. One tiny step after another. Eventually, you'll discover that you have let it go fully. Then, celebrate. Give yourself a bit pat on your back. You've done well. As Eckhart Tolle said, you're on the path to regaining your power:

"Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on."