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I struggle with repressing pain and coping through distraction in part because I grew up in a home intensely focused on "the glass half full" attitude. Early on, I learned it was not okay to complain, or express much of any negative feeling at all. The solution to in my opinion, legitimate pain, was to simply "deal with it".
I've been in therapy for four years for depression, and anxiety -- and all the ways I've coped with such things. I've met with my most recent counselor for nearly three years now, and have yet to fully allow myself to be open and express pain.. he's constantly encouraging me to do so, but it's articles like this that make me cringe and think I'll only do him harm by trying to explain.
Beyond such an artificial patient-counselor relationship, I've been trying to be open with close friends... however, after some time, I still haven't gotten to the more vulnerable parts, and after reading this I wonder -- how do you excuse any pain, no matter how trivial it might seem to an on-looker? How are you to know if someone is a chronic complainer, or if they are truly struggling.. if its about longevity, and their obstacles continue, should they be seen as chronic complainers? It seems like this article is suggesting pain needs to be legitimized, or that obstacles need to be solved in a time-sensitive way.. otherwise, you turn into a burden to those around you in the attempt of being honest.
Does that make sense?
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