Can Religion Be Your Purpose?

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I’m often asked whether religion can be a person’s purpose. It’s a fair question, especially when I talk about the two different types of purpose—what I call "Big P Purpose" and "little p purpose."

Big P Purpose is goal-oriented. It’s about striving toward something external and often audacious, like becoming a certain kind of person, achieving an ultimate goal, or proving oneself in some way. While this kind of purpose can be motivating, it can also be anxiety-inducing, because the goalpost is always shifting.

Little p purpose, on the other hand, is process-oriented. It’s not about reaching a final destination but about engaging in activities that light you up, bring fulfillment, and connect you with others in a meaningful way. Unlike Big P Purpose, it is inherently abundant and sustainable—it’s something you do rather than something you chase.

So, when people ask me whether religion can be their purpose, my answer is always the same: yes and no. Religion can be both Big P Purpose and little p purpose. And how it serves you largely depends on how you approach it.

Religion as Little p Purpose

When religion functions as a little p purpose, it is life-giving. It brings joy, connection, and fulfillment. People who experience religion in this way are often excited by their faith—not because they’re striving for a distant goal, but because the practice of their religion itself lights them up.

For many, faith provides a sense of belonging and community. It offers opportunities to serve, to counsel, to volunteer, and to connect with others in meaningful ways. When religion is approached from this perspective, the focus isn’t on achieving heaven or reaching a state of perfection—it’s on the process of living one’s values. It’s about gathering with others, engaging in acts of kindness, and creating deeper interpersonal connections.

This version of religion, in my view, is its best expression. It fosters strong bonds between people, strengthens communities, and contributes to happiness and well-being. Studies have even shown that people who are actively involved in faith-based communities tend to live longer, healthier, and more fulfilled lives. When religion is a little p purpose, it functions as an abundant source of meaning rather than a stressful pursuit of an unattainable ideal.

When Religion Becomes Big P Purpose

On the flip side, religion can also take the form of Big P Purpose, and this is where it can become problematic. When religion is framed as a goal to be achieved rather than a process to be experienced, it often leads to anxiety, division, and even exclusion.

Big P Purpose in religion shows up when faith becomes about striving for perfection—about becoming godly or proving one’s devotion to an ultimate standard. It manifests when people see religion as a strict path with clear rules for who is “in” and who is “out.” Rather than fostering connection, this version of religion creates separation: those who believe the “right” way versus those who don’t, the devout versus the outsiders.

This kind of purpose can be incredibly anxiety-provoking. Why? Because the pursuit of perfection—whether spiritual or otherwise—is inherently unattainable. No one can ever be truly perfect, yet when religion is treated as a goal rather than a practice, people feel pressure to meet an impossible standard. They may feel guilt, shame, or unworthiness when they fall short. Instead of religion being a source of peace and fulfillment, it becomes a source of stress.

This is where religion can become divisive. Instead of uniting people through shared values and experiences, it creates factions. It turns faith into a measuring stick rather than a guiding light.

A Question of Perspective

At its best, religion can be a powerful force for connection, healing, and joy. At its worst, it can be an endless pursuit of an unattainable ideal that fosters anxiety and division. The key difference lies in whether it is approached as a process (little p purpose) or as a goal (Big P Purpose).

I want to be clear: this isn’t a question of whether religion itself is good or bad. Nor is it about which religion is “right” or “wrong.” Instead, this is about how any belief system—religious or not—functions in a person’s life.

If your faith brings you joy, sustains you, connects you with others, and enriches your daily experience, then it likely serves as a little p purpose—and that’s a wonderful thing. But if it creates pressure, anxiety, or division, it may have become a Big P Purpose—one that is more about chasing an ideal than truly living in the moment.

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Ultimately, the question is not whether religion can be your purpose, but rather how it is shaping your experience of life. If it brings light and connection, it is likely serving you well. If it brings stress and separation, it may be worth reexamining how it functions in your pursuit of meaning.