Psychopathic Scapegoating

Did you ever feel left out, picked over, excluded, or castigated by a member of your own family or by someone close to you? Were you treated more like a stage prop growing up and pushed out like a social outcast?

If so, you may be a victim of scapegoating, and it could be possible that the person doing the scapegoating displays high levels of psychopathic traits.

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Psychopathic scapegoating

The level of psychopathic characteristics is usually measured with the Psychopathy Checklist-Revised, which was developed by preeminent psychopathy researcher Robert Hare. Item 16 from this checklist has a special connection to scapegoating behavior. The Item is entitled “Failure to Accept Responsibility for Own Actions.” In the formal item description, Hare notes that an individual exhibiting this trait often places the blame for his or her actions on others, including family members.¹ This may take the form of scapegoating—consistently blaming some other person to shift blame and avoid responsibility. Psychopaths are not the only scapegoaters, but scapegoating is one of the psychopath’s favorite tools.

Scapegoating within a family

According to Rebecca C. Mandeville, author of the book Rejected, Shamed, & Blamed, “While most people might occasionally feel excluded or ‘left out’ of their family for one reason or another, family scapegoating behaviors go far beyond that. In fact, scapegoating is closely related to bullying, and both qualify as overt or covert forms of psycho-emotional abuse."² In connection with the scapegoated child, Mandeville notes that “It has been my observation that the ‘scapegoat child’ is often the most psychologically-minded, emotionally sensitive, intuitive, and ‘aware’ person in their family.”³

The impact of scapegoating

Having a mother and sister who both exhibited high levels of psychopathic traits, I experienced scapegoating firsthand. Time and again, I felt baffled by their treatment, often overlooking it. However, much to my chagrin, their treatment persisted. This affected my reputation, my self-worth, and my relationships with other people. As inner tensions mounted, it occurred to me that I was being reduced to feeling like nothing.

The treatment came in the form of ignoring, belittling, purposefully being skipped over, smearing my name, impeding my ability to function, and labeling me as “slow” from when I was a child. I was set up so that they could shift blame onto me for the consequences of their actions. An example of how this was done is especially illustrative.

Scapegoating on display: an illustrative example

When I was 21 and on college summer break, my sister enticed me to help her as a “go-fer” on a quixotic publishing project she had impulsively launched. She had no experience or publishing background, but was to be the editor and founder of a new woman’s fashion magazine. My job was to answer the phone, process incoming mail, type outgoing letters, run errands, and do whatever she asked me to do. I was excited because it seemed to me that my sister was accepting me, respecting my ability, and looking for my help.

At the time I took the job, I was unaware that she had milked her then-husband for some start-up funds. She sought to bilk prospective “backers” with lies and distortions about the likely success of the magazine. She had no business plan, yet she embarked on a project that was destined to fail from the outset. She began luring people to work for her as design consultants, photographers, models, and other staff positions without any financial support or capital outlay. From the outset, there were burgeoning numbers of people coming and going, who were all hired with no money for payroll. She sought bank financing and support from prospective partners, expecting that her charm plus glib explanations would convince them. She issued checks to staff, including me, that bounced, knowing full well that there were insufficient funds in the bank.

The business failed shortly after it began, but not before racking up thousands of dollars in expenses that benefited my sister. I had no management role, but I saw she was neglecting what she was supposed to do. Instead of accepting responsibility for the fiasco, she shifted as much blame as possible onto me, lying that I caused it, blaming the collapse on me—her scapegoat. After all the years of abuse and neglect I had experienced at her hands, I should have known not to get involved. Many believed the lies she spread. This is the convincing power of the psychopathic scapegoater.