I tend to dress pretty modestly (and don't intend on ever taking my clothes off for another person), and as such could get by with Spanx and a corset on my body. It's the face I want to change: I would love to have lipo done on my double-chin. I of course don't expect to be Jennifer Lawrence anytime soon, if ever (and even she is often called "fat" by industry standards, which is defined as x > Kate Moss). But the face makes a difference: without the double-chin (and with plenty of shapewear), I'd be thought of as "curvy," which apparently is somewhat in right now. With it, I'm chubby. It's too bad that it costs $3-5K just to suck fat cells out of such a small area of the body. Yeah, sure, I could do the whole diet and exercise thing, but that just isn't feasible right now with the miserable life I'm living (and the stress eating I do because of it). I'm sure if it wasn't food, it'd be cigarettes, booze, or drugs. (Probably cigarettes and cocaine for the weight loss benefits!)

I don't really care about the whole gender-stereotyping thing, and don't consider myself a feminist because I don't spend 18 hours of the day pondering why pink is for girls and blue is for boys (and where that leaves girls or boys who like green). I've pretty much resigned myself to the fact that beauty is everything and sex does sell. People are superficial and vain, and plenty of them probably thought an Obama-Palin ticket would be better than a Hillary-Chris Christie one because Obama is "hawt" and Palin's a MILF, while Hillary is butch and Christie is fat. Fat is not in, especially if you're female (Christie could probably get away with it in the media if he was a Democrat. King of Queens wouldn't work if Leah Remini was in the chubbo Kevin James role -- Melissa McCarthy, let's say -- and was TV-married to James Franco; she'd be a cat lady living alone). So I think my self-esteem might improve at least somewhat if I could pass as curvy and not chubby (because of the face).

None of the Botox/filler crap or even breast implants for me. I want to take out stuff, not add it on!