To Be Happy, Use Your Strengths

What are two to three qualities about yourself that you are most proud of?

How often do you feel you use these strengths in your work, relationships, or hobbies?

When do you feel most like your genuine self during your daily life?

When it comes to happiness, it's all about fit. According to the "goodness of fit" model, you’ll excel and feel more fulfilled in environments that match your unique characteristics (Lerner, 2002). Research shows that those who use their strengths more report greater well-being (Littman-Ovadia and Steger, 2010). People tend to do better in workplaces and social settings that match their unique abilities, where they benefit from being well-adjusted. Those unable to use their strengths are typically in careers, vocations, or relationships that do not match their characteristics and, according to the model, are less fulfilled.

If you are especially curious, you may thrive as a researcher or professor but struggle with repetitive or mundane tasks. Or maybe you excel at keeping your cool under pressure or can make others around you feel at ease with your sense of humor. An even temperament could make you shine as a crisis worker or in the ER, and being a jokester could serve you well in social contexts such as sales. When you use your strengths, your sense of purpose and self-esteem rise, as you feel in your heart that you are contributing something special to the world.

We're Happier When We Use Our Strengths

Peterson and Seligman (2004) suggest that individuals are happier when they use their strengths, as they feel that their potential is being fulfilled. When you routinely use your strengths in life, you'll feel good about yourself and the contributions you're making to others, whether that's your family or your co-workers. And, you might find yourself feeling more appreciated by those others in your life as well. For example, Lavy, Littman-Ovadia, and Bareli (2014) found that couples were more satisfied in their relationships when they reported using their strengths in their marriages. These findings suggest that if a person’s unique strengths “match” the setting of their marriage, they are more able to use them, receive greater positive feedback from their partner, feel more appreciated, and thus be happier in their relationship.

Remember, your strengths may suit one context but not another, so fit affects how you adjust. Consider your unique strengths and how they show up in your life; you might even take a strengths test, such as the VIA 24 Strengths Classification. Understanding your strengths helps you find the right fit and improve your well-being. Identify your strengths and think about how to apply them where you already are—in your current relationships and work—or consider changes to use them more.

You have unique qualities to offer; discover and use them to reach your potential. Knowing and using your unique strengths can help you fulfill your potential and increase your life satisfaction.